Hi everyone! Ok so let me start by saying that I am not flaking on the Clinton slam piece, I just have an offensive amount of work and was going to watch the debate so cut me some slack plus I thought it would be a good idea to record my thoughts while watching the debate. I swear to you I’ll write the piece on Clinton next week, sacrificing the piece I was going to write on Gary Johnson but let’s be honest, that wouldn’t be too great. So in the meantime, please enjoy my thoughts on the debate.
- 9:05
- 9:06
- Hill-dog talking about maintaining the supreme court rulings, I fuck with that
- Is Trump death staring the camera?
- Are his eyes closed or is he looking down?
- 9:08
- Trump hasn’t flown off the handle yet…good.
- He’s pandering to the far right, alluding to people he would choose, he’s so vague.
- He’s the Political version of a fundamentalist Christian.
- Dude…no one is going to take your guns away.
- 9:10
- Trump looks grumpy…Looking Trumpy?
- 9:13
- Trump has just given the camera Scooby Doo eyes.
- Yeah come on Clinton it’s not as if you’re not backed by special interest groups *cough* wall street *cough*
- 9:14
- I don’t think Trump knows what sarcasm means.
- What the hell do you mean help the second amendment?? Its alive and well.
- 9:15
- Dude make your mind up about what you want the court to do. Do you know how it works?
- Has this guy read freakanomics? He should read it
- 9:16
- God, Hillary is so professional. Well…compared to that juvenile oompa loompa stuck in an older oompa loompa’s body anyone looks professional
- 9:17
- Trump looks perpetually uncomfortable.
- He keeps staring directly into the camera when he’s not talking, stay out of my soul!!!!
- 9:19
- This man says baby a lot, he says it in a pretty funny way.
- I also don’t think he knows how abortions work.
- “you can tear the baby out of the womb the day before its born”
- Shut up Trump, it’s not your turn, and you’re babbling nonsense
- 9:20
- The WALL!!!!!
- The only feasible way we could maintain a wall the one he’s describing is if we made criminals work it #NightsWatch #YouKnowNothingDonaldSnow.
- Woah amnesty isn’t a disaster.
- 9:21
- Ooooh you know some Spanglish do you Trumpy?
- 9:23
- Does this man understand budgeting? Doesn’t really go hand in hand with expanded government and lower taxes. Trust me, that fucks me all the time in Empire Total war.
- 9:25
- Very much better? What does that mean?
- I don’t think NAFTA was one of the worst deals….the Treaty of Versailles was one of the worst deals
- Yeah! Get em Williams.
- 9:26
- Can this man PLEASE STOP LOOKING AT THE CAMERA!!!!!!
- Oh she’s roasting him.
- His eyelids are pretty weird.
- 9:27
- This man sounds like a conspiracy theorist.
- Did he just say “bigly”?
- He just said bigly again, who is this man? Where did you find him?
- Hillary IT IS NOT YOUR TIME TO SPEAK SHUT UP!!!!
- 9:29
- @Hillary Ok yeah the Russians are bad, but still, you kinda messed up. You wanna acknowledge that?
- 9:30
- Williams taming candidates and audiences, he’s the moderator we’ve always wanted, but have never deserved.
- This man is a child…a funny child I’ll give him that.
- Ok so one minute you’re saying she and Obama are deporting everyone like crazy and now you’re saying that she wants to flood the borders.
- 9:32
- This man hates facts.
- He has gone off the rails.
- 9:33
- Jesus Christ Trump no one likes Putin, you’re the only one who likes Putin.
- 9:35
- Trump is like an emo kid who is really butt hurt about the state of America, it’s not that bad bro.
- 9:38
- Yo she's name dropping Bernie, laying that cheese in the millennial trap.
- 9:39
- Dude, you’re supposed to be talking about your tax program not hers.
- 9:42
- This man is terribly rude and I don’t believe he knows what formality is.
- 9:45
- My roomie is hitting on this tinder girl so I can’t hear anything rn.
- 9:45
- CHINA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! CHINA CHINA CHINA CHINA CHINA.
- 9:47
- This man just alludes to studies and reports without citing figures, who is this?
- Jesus Christ Bill Clinton isn’t running for election, chill out bro.
- 9:47
- He did not just bring up fact checking did he? Oh my god he did. That. Is. Hilarious.
- 9:49
- He’s like a possessive toddler “My time! Mine!”
- 9:53
- Yeah you don’t have to pay the Trump supporters to start fights do you?
- 9:54
- But you did say that Donald.
- 10:05
- Sorry had to change the laundry, missed a little bit.
- The voters will see through the election? I’m surprised so many people haven’t seen through the thin, thin layer of gold that conceals the rest of the shit underneath you.
- Dude….you keep harping on about the emails, Chris Christie did the same thing.
- 10:06
- This man is literally like a toddler who thinks that because he can’t win, the system is rigged.
- *Hillary speaks* God she’s so poised, so professional, she’s a paladin fighting the forces of the alt right…a pandering robotic paladin who can’t connect with millennials no matter how many dabs she hits on Ellen. But still, a valiant crusading paladin fighting the hordes of angry revisionist historian keyboard warriors.
- 10:09
- Damn she did her research, or some underpaid staffer did…probably the underpaid staffer.
- Patton would be spinning in his grave if he could see this election Donald so STFU.
- 10:11
- How many times can this man say Mosul?
- He is literally like a college student who has to bullshit their way through a paper.
- Fear mongering.
- Go on say Mosul again.
- I’m pretty sure you were for the invasion of Iraq Trump.
- 10:13
- The commentator’s spine is waning.
- Going.
- Going.
- Gone.
- 10:14
- Holy. Shit. This man is literally like me when I’m trying to piss off my brother “you’re stupid” “No, your face is stupid”.
- 10:15
- Aleppo!!! Quick someone find Gary Johnson.
- Williams calling out Trump, who is this man fighting the mediator?
- Trump writing an academic paper and citing sources “You know it, I know it, everyone knows it”.
- 10:17
- Someone please call Trump’s nanny to take him home, he needs his apple juice.
- Mate…make up your mind one moment she’s bringing in thousands of immigrants and the next she is kicking them out by the thousands, please stick to one.
- 10:20
- Whose. Mans. Is. This?
- 10:21
- Oooh looks like Williams found his balls again.
- 10:22
- I bet Trump was the kid who told everyone he got a girlfriend over the summer and had sex, but she lives in Canada so no one could meet her. Not Canada, how silly of me he hates foreigners, apart from his trophy wife, probably Michigan.
- 10:24
- She’s so poised, uses facts, pretty formal, uses economics theory…everything this man isn’t.
- 10:25
- WILL THE OOMPA LOOMPA PLEASE LET THE LADY SPEAK!!!!!!!!!!!!!
- 10:27
- In the year 17? Really Donald? Really? Do you mean the adolescent years of Jesus Christ or 2017? I’m going to be nice and give you the benefit of the doubt but ffs.
- 10:28
- “Such a nasty woman” Christ man she’s not Lizzy Borden, she’s not a black widow, chill.
- 10:30 closing statements
- Nice pandering Hillary, pander the shit out of those voters.
- This man cannot talk without his hand gestures
- Noticed that after the debate Trump is immediately surrounded by his family for some sort of somber talk, Clinton makes a B line for the audience.
