Regret.

That's a tough word.

The dictionary says that regret is "feeling sad, repentant or disappointed over something that has happened or been done (especially a loss or missed opportunity)."

I don't think the dictionary quite understands the deep feeling of almost guilt when you regret something.

When I got my first tattoo, oh boy I regretted it. I cried about it to myself after and wished I could take it back. However, it eventually healed and I was no longer embarrassed to show it off. It still upsets me that I allowed other peoples opinions about what I put on my body make me feel guilty.

When I didn't study for a test and watched Netflix all night instead, pulling off a 72 when I should have done better I was filled with regret.

The list goes on and on.

We're taught to live life without regret.

But why do we feel this way? Why do we sit here and mull over things we wished we should have done differently, even done at all? Why do we allow ourselves to feel so disappointed in ourselves?

Kathryn Schulz, a self proclaimed Wrongologist gives a beautiful Ted Talk about regret. She says not to regret regret.

She says we shouldn't pride ourselves in having no regrets, on the contrary we should wear our regret with pride. We should bask in all our regretful glory. It's part of being human, it's part of just living.

So may I suggest we put down the "cultural Kool-Aid" as Schulz says and suck it up. Living life in the pursuit of regrets rather in the pursuit of the lack of regrets is far more worthy than constantly looking forward.

Dwell on things. Let them make you better. Hell, make the wrong decision on purpose. Live a life of regrets. Regrets prove you've lived. Prove you've conquered. Survived. Lived for something other than the future. Let your string of regrets launch you. An arrow can only be shot by being pulled back. So while life throws you curveballs and regrets, let them pull you back and shoot you into your wildly unimaginable future.