I've grown up always knowing what I want. What I want to eat, what I want to do, what I want to be, where I want to go, what I want out of life. I've always had a picture in my head of exactly how my future was going to turn out. And while that has changed from me being a writer to being a lawyer to being a fashionista and back to me being a writer, I have still always had a plan. I've just always known what I wanted. Or so I thought.
This last week I was celebrating my final week of studying abroad with new and old friends alike and while waiting in between our courses at dinner, we were asking each other questions. Silly things like "if you could be an animal, what would you be?" or "what is your favorite memory of the semester?" to more serious topics such as "what is your ideal life?" and "what is your perfect significant other like?"
I began thinking as my friends started listing off traits and qualities of the person they hoped to find one day and I realized something that I think is pretty important.
We, as people, make lists in our heads about what we want. We want to do this and that in college, graduate on time, move to another city, get a solid job, fall in love, start a family and live happily ever after. We have everything set up for a flawless life, but what if that's all wrong? What if nobody really knows what they want until it's right in front of them? And what if you can't confine your life to a simple catalog? Then what?
I made this list in my head once when I was younger about everything I could want in a guy. Like dark hair and warm brown eyes. Tan skin and and a deep voice. A laugh that is so contagious everyone around him can't help but smile. The list goes on and I've met my fair share of guys that fit this specific list perfectly, but I've realized recently that just as my life isn't a list, neither are people. And it's unfair to think so. I was shown this year that I actually didn't even know what I wanted or what I was looking for. If you think you know what you want, I hate to be the one to say it, but you are fooling yourself. Nobody really knows what they want. Well, not until it's right in front of them.
In your life you will meet people that change everything for you. And while it may be a few people that each change small things for you or one significant person who changes it all, your path will be rearranged. And I think that's the beauty of living. You never really do know where you are going to end up or with whom.
But I highly recommend that when life introduces you to a person who just might beautifully wreck everything you had all planned out on that list of yours, someone who challenges you and makes you rethink everything you once thought you knew you wanted, you grab them and never let go... Regardless of if they fit on your "list".
After all, I am speaking from experience. Thanks B.