Many times, I come home late at night and sit in the dark. Sometimes I’m studying and sometimes I’m watching television. Every single time, my mom would tell me to turn the lights on because “watching in the dark” or “reading in the dark” is going to “damage my vision.” I’m 18. I’ve believed that lie for 18 years. 18 YEARS.

Let me share with you a couple more things your parents have probably lied to you about.

1. If you keep making a face, you’ll get stuck like that forever

This is a classic. I think our parents were just annoyed of us making ugly faces and acting stupid, so they wanted to scare us. Your face muscles are elastic, so they’ll always return to their original shape regardless of what face you make.

2. Cracking your knuckles is bad for you

Some parents even went to the extent to tell their children they’d get arthritis if they continued cracking their knuckles. Damn lie.

3. You’ll get acne if you eat too much chocolate/candy

So many people up until college limit their sugar intake for fear of breaking out. What a shame.

4. Your hair will grow faster and thicker if you cut the ends of it

Umm, actually no. Cutting the ends of your hair doesn’t affect anything; it’s the follicles in your scalp that affect how fast and how much your hair grows. You can blame your parents for that ‘shroom cut.

5. You can’t swim after eating

Yes. You can.

6. My all time favorite: *drum roll please* “We’ll see”

Nope. No. You will not see. They’ve already made up their minds. It’s not happening. We’ll see is literally the equivalent of ‘no’ in parent language.

Honestly though, I’m probably going to say these exact same things to my kids.