I dated you for nearly eight months. I knew you for about a year and a half. We spent four of our sixteen months not talking. We spent the other four months as friends.
We both seemingly moved on. I got a new girlfriend who made me happy. She gave me things you couldn't possibly give to me because you live five hours from me. I know it hurt you to see me move on with her. I think it hurt you so much that you went out trying to find something (or in this case, someone) to make you feel as whole as I did.
I think you wanted to try to hurt me. You wanted me to be jealous of your new significant other. The problem with this was you didn't want a relationship. You told me you weren't ready for that again and that you weren't actually interested in anyone you were talking to. You were solely talking to people to try to get to me.
The truth was that you made me sad. We'd gone through so much and you were purposefully trying to hurt me. I hadn't gotten with my girlfriend as some form of revenge. I truly care about her. It hurts and upsets me knowing you wanted revenge so badly on me that you'd consider getting into relationships you know you didn't want.
I'm not going to play the innocent card. We both were contributors to our relationship's failure. Maybe I tried too hard. Maybe I was too passive aggressive. Maybe I moved on too quickly.
I'm sorry I moved on: only because it hurt you. I'm not sorry that I left you though. I left someone who was toxic for me. I left someone who'd make me feel guilty and like it was all my fault at the end of our relationship. You failed to see my side of things. You failed to see that not all of it was my fault.
You act like I did everything to hurt you, but honestly, it was my way of coping. I had to cope with the fact that you and I couldn't be together. Not now, and probably not ever. I had to accept that my first love was not going to be my last. I had to realize that no matter how much I wanted you, I couldn't have you. I couldn't have you how I needed you.
Now this may sound dramatic, but you were my first love. You're the one who taught me what love feels like. But you also taught me what it's like for your heart to break over and over. You taught me what it's like to be on a roller coaster of a relationship. You taught me that despite your love for someone, you can still hurt them so much. You taught me that some people just can't stay in your life.
We had too much of a past. Staying friends was a bit of a ridiculous idea because we both knew we weren't going to get over one another while we were still in each other's lives. We both knew this, but tried anyway.
At the end of the day, I know you cringed at her name. You cringed when you asked about her. You didn't want to admit I'd found someone who could take your place. I'd told you no one ever could take your place, which to a certain extent, is true. No one will be my first love. No one will know me in exactly the way you did. But someone can take your spot in my heart. I'm sorry that it has to be this way. Trust me, if I could mend ties with you and NOT negatively effect myself mentally or physically, I would. But I can't.
Some people aren't meant to stay in your life. Some people are simply a lesson.
I would've always been there for you. I still will be, despite all that's happened. You're the one who cut me off, so that was your choice. At the end of the day, I know you were toxic for me. It didn't take a genius to see how unhealthy you were for me. I'd always go back to you. I wanted you even if you hurt me and weren't good for me. I would've done anything to be with you.
Unfortunately, you intensified my depression and anxiety. You caused several anxiety attacks. You were so toxic.
Don't get me wrong, I still love you as a person, but I'm so happy to be able to honestly say I no longer love you. I've finally gotten over the heartache. I've finally allowed myself to heal.
One of the last things you said to me was that you know you deserved better than how I treated you. I'm sorry I was always up and down with you. I couldn't figure out what I wanted or what I could handle. I wasn't always fair, but neither were you. Believe it or not, I deserve(d) better than you too. We clearly weren't meant to be, no matter how much we wanted to be.
I hope you remember the good memories. But if you don't, I guess that's your choice. I remember them. They don't make me smile anymore. I never thought I'd see the day I'd feel such resentment and disappointment in you.
Here I am. Still breathing. Still living. And yet, you're nowhere to be found.
Maybe some day, when we're older, we can be friends again. But if that's not in our cards, I want to say thank you. It was nice knowing you. You've taught me so much.
I hope you're doing well. I know I am.
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1. The Freshmen 15? It's real.
WARNING: The buffet style campus dining spots are a TRAP. If you're eating and out drinking on the weekends, it is EXTREMELY LIKELY that you're going to gain a little bit of weight. Gaining weight isn't really a bad thing, but staying healthy is definitely important. Take a walk or a run to even out that junk food intake, but feel free to sneak that late night five-cheese panini at 1AM.
2. Make friends with some of your floormates.
Your first year of college is arguably the most memorable time of your college life. You live with your floormates for two semesters, and you see them in the hall all the time. Make it a point to say "what's up", it'll definitely make your year more fun.
3. College is hard. Don't sell yourself short.
Higher education. It's not high school, your professors are a little less prominent than your HS teachers. This being said, you are responsible for your own eucation. It's a little hard having all this freedom and responsibility for (probably) the first time in your life, but it's important to realize that it's a little harder because you're sort of on your own.
4. You don't HAVE to have sex to "get it over with".
This is IMPORTANT. Deciding to have sex when you get to college? Cool. Deciding you want to wait? Awesome. Having sex because you just want to get it over with? Hm, think about that. Your decision is your decision, but if you're iffy about entering the "college hook-up culture", PLEASE really think about how important it is for you to have sex.
5. Be careful who you hook up with and who you open up to.
As I said earlier: beware of the infamous "college hook-up culture". IMO, it's a chance for college guys or gals to lead the other on (the majority of the time). It's not possible to control your feelings, but it's possible to cut a hook-up off/talk about how you feel. Better for you in the long run, trust me.
6. Work around scheduling a class before 12PM.
You might have the idea that, "Oh, I got up at 8AM in high school. I can do it again." No. No, you can't. I have very little explanation for this. You'll enjoy the extra sleep. If you don't believe me, schedule a morning class, and see how you feel.
7. Dress how you want to dress.
You wanna dress up? Slap on some make up, put on some heels, and head to your lecture. You were up late last night? Roll out of bed in what you fell asleep in last night. The good thing about college? You realize that no one is really focused on you, so it's a good time to just "do you" and rock it.
8. The drinking every chance you get? Not healthy. Stop that.
9. When you DO go out, be safe.
Check your drink, make sure you're pacing yourself, don't wander home by yourself, etc. The essentials.
10. Spend your money frugally.
Living the ramen/ easy-mac life is a real thing. There's a reason why it's a college student's go-to: it's easy to make, and it's cheap as heck. It's important to practice money saving tips- even though it seems almost impossible.
11. Those events your RA hosts? Go to them. Some of them are awesome, some offer free food.
As a poor college student, the word free resonates in all of our ears. RA events are not only a gateway to free food, but are also a way to meet more people on your floor/ in your building.
12. It's not all about school- enjoy yourself.
College is a new time in your life where you're working towards your future, but it's also a time where you meet people and have experiences like no other. Let yourself breathe sometimes, and just enjoy this experience.
What about combined income from two minimum-wage workers? Wouldn't that put them above the poverty line? In a nuclear family with two working parents and two children, their combined yearly wage would be about $30,160. That's only $7,846 above the poverty line. Now, let's take into account rent, food, gas, utilities, car insurance, health insurance, school supplies, clothes, and tuition. Try and see how $30,160 would cover all those expenses in a year – it doesn't. The minimum wage is not a living wage.
The minimum wage is not a living wage.
StableDiffusion
Here are some myths that I would like to present and debunk:
Raising the minimum wage will kill jobs. This is false. In a March 2011 report, the Center for Economic and Policy Research concluded that raising the minimum wage would not only help workers but actually have the possibility of increasing job openings. Better pay leads people to spend more money, and the cycle repeats.
"Nobody living in one of the most influential nations in the world should be worried about making ends meet."
influential nations
StableDiffusion
On June 2, 2014 , Seattle changed the city's minimum wage to $15 dollars. Following that procedure, unemployment decreased 17.46 percent – falling from a previous 6.3 percent to 5.2 percent.
Raising the minimum wage will hurt small business. Not only has a higher minimum wage worked in cities across the United States, but a 2006 study by the Center for American Progress and Policy Matters compared small business performances and found that the small businesses who paid the higher wages were more profitable.
Mostly teenagers work minimum-wage jobs. Again, this is false. Half of minimum-wage workers are 25 years old or older. Most minimum-wage workers support their family on this income – and 28 percent of these individuals have children.
Raising the minimum wadge
The minimum wage is not sufficient to uphold and support an individual, especially individuals with families. I've often heard: "It isn't fair that someone working in a fast food restaurant will get paid the same as a college professional!" If we raise the minimum wage to, let’s say, $11 an hour, it would still be a lower amount than that of a college professional. Even so, someone not having a college degree doesn't make their worth any less valuable. Nobody deserves to live in poverty. Nobody living in one of the most influential nations in the world should be worried about making ends meet. We are a nation of equality and opportunity – it's time to let some of that opportunity flow.
What is the current minimum wage at the federal level?
Federal minimum wage is currently $7.25 per hour. Many states also have minimum wage laws, and the employee is entitled to the higher of the two minimum wages. (U.S. Dept. of Labor)
What are the benefits of raising the minimum wage?
A higher minimum wage means less workers living below the poverty line, more workers being able to make ends meet and potentially spend beyond that, and workers would be more productive upon the increase.
What are the states that have set a $15/hour minimum wage?
California is at $15.50 per hour, Washington is at $15.74, and Massachusetts is at $15. These are the only states to have a $15 minimum wage as of Jan. 1, 2023. (The Economic Policy Institute Tracker)
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