Dear second semester freshmen,

You are probably in one of two places right now: 1) you’re feeling great and absolutely love school and can’t wait to get back or 2) you’re feeling confused and not sure you’re happy and not quite ready to go back. Or, maybe you’re even feeling a little bit of both.

When looking at schools my junior year of high school, my parents gave me a 6-hour radius for where I could apply… every single school I applied to was exactly 6 hours away. I wanted to get out of my small town and experience new things; I needed independence. Right off the bat I wanted to do everything on my own and prove to my friends and family at home that I could handle this new experience. I was, for the first time, completely responsible for myself. I didn’t ask for financial support from my parents, I didn’t ask for emotional support from my family or friends, and I didn’t ask for academic support from my professors. I was juggling work, school, and making new friends all on my own. By Thanksgiving break I was a complete mess; I felt like the weight of the world was on my shoulders. After keeping everything bottled up for 3 months, I finally just broke down to my mom. I told her that I couldn’t handle it and I wanted to transfer to be closer to home. She told me that it was my decision, but she urged me to give it one more semester at UNH.

So, going back to school I talked to my hall director (who also happened to be my next door neighbor) about what I was feeling. He told me that independence doesn’t mean isolation and that it was okay to ask for help. He encouraged me to go to office hours and ask questions, cut down on a few shifts at the dining hall, and talk to friends and family when I was having a tough week. After our talk, I started getting involved with more clubs and activities, going to socials in my hall, and talking to people when I needed help. I soon realized that everybody was in the same boat as me, my friends were feeling stressed and homesick too; I wasn’t alone. This support system made all the difference in the world for me. I started to take some of the pressure off myself and really enjoy my college experience. So, what I learned about myself is that although independence is important to me, that doesn’t mean I can’t ask for help. Everyone struggles with something, and everyone needs a support system. Life needs to be taken one step at a time; you never know what’s around the corner and it’s not possible to plan every aspect of your life because things change every day. College is about figuring all of that out and learning to enjoy life.

So, for those of you who are in the same boat as I was returning to school, don’t worry. Give your school a shot and give yourself a shot to have fun. Take some pressure off of yourself and ask for help when you need it. And for those of you who loved your first semester and can’t wait to get back – that’s great! Reach out to those who may need a nudge in the right direction. And, if at the end of your second semester you find that it's not the right fit for you, then that's okay too. Learning to be an adult and make decisions that are right for you is all part of the experience. Just make sure whatever you do, you're putting your best foot forward.

Sincerely,

A fellow wildcat