Dear 9-year-old me,
I know that you feel like you're alone. I know that you're in the middle of the worst years of your life. I know that it's not fair that this is happening to you. I know you're wondering if it's all even worth it anymore. I'm here to tell you it is.
You will have good experiences after all of this is over. You will come out stronger than you are right now. You will meet people who will be there for you and help you through this. You will learn that not everyone leaves you. You will learn that some people leave you but they don't purposely do so. You will learn that even if you can't see people, they aren't really gone.
You have people who love you, even if you can't see them right now. You have people who want you to live your life to the fullest. You have people who will make you see that life isn't just pain.
However, you will continue to face challenges. You will be hit with things in life that seemingly will destroy you, but they won't. You will continue to face death, but you can get through it. You will have nightmares about these past four years, but you will learn how to control them. Once you get through them, you'll see that you needed to have them to get a new perspective.
I promise you, you will recover. You will live through this. You will learn so much. You will be able to take your experiences and help others without feeling the pain, and guilt, and emotion all over again.
I am you ten years later. I'm now in college and have found the best people you will meet in your entire life. They may not understand but they will listen. You will find your voice again and people will tell you that you are an inspiration to them. You will be an inspiration to yourself. I know that sounds a bit selfish but it's true. I have looked back and seen how broken you are and then looked at myself and seen how much you've grown as a person because of the stuff you just went through and I've been inspired by you, by your ability to keep fighting even though you keep thinking about giving up. I am here to tell you not to give into your thoughts. Fight. You will win.
From your 19 year old self
