Hi brother,

I wish you were here. I'm not sure why but I have a hunch we would've been the type of siblings that are also best friends. It could've been the type of friendship that is perfectly balanced. I imagine you having a spontaneous spirit that would push me to let go and just move where the wind blows. And then I would get to remind your free spirit that somethings should be taken more seriously. I bet you would've been funny. The kind of funny that would make my belly ache from laughing at your jokes so often and for so long. Your jokes would make everyone love you, and you'd be a total catch with the girls. However, as your younger sister, I would feel the need to make sure the girls you choose live up to the standards I put in my head for you. Of course, my opinion wouldn't really hold any weight, and we would probably get in arguments over that. But we would always remain best friends because holding grudges against each other would just be too difficult.

I wish you were here. You would love Jason and Kayla. The 19 years I've spent with them as siblings have made me feel so blessed. Sure, we fight (..I admit usually I started the fighting with Kayla and Jason would step in yelling at us to stop). But aside from the occasional argument, the three of us really love each other. But it should've been the four of us. I'm sure Jason would've really appreciated having another boy in the house as a kid. You guys could pass the soccer ball together and get into a bunch of trouble cause that's just what little boys do. Kayla and I could annoy you guys always asking "can we play too?" You both would roll your eyes and agree because you didn't want mom to yell at you for excluding us later.

I wish you were here. I remember as a young girl feeling like the third wheel. Jason and Kayla had this bond that I just couldn't compete with. Wherever Jason went, Kayla followed. Whatever Jason did, Kayla did it too. Eventually we grew up, and I don't feel left out of anything with them anymore. But how perfect it would've been to have you around. You and I would have had that same bond that Jason and Kayla got to have. I would've tried to be the best little sister a big brother could ever ask for. Doing everything you asked me too and playing any game you wanted to play. I would've done these things because you would have been my amazing big brother that I trusted and loved.

I wish you were here. I wish miscarriages didn't happen. I wish mom would've got the chance to carry you for the full nine months. But the world is broken. We lose people we shouldn't lose. However, I'm so excited to meet you one day. I know you've been smiling down on us from heaven all these years. Once I join you in heaven, we'll have eternity to do all of the things we should've had the chance to do as siblings.

I wish you were here.

Your younger sister,

Lindsey