To my old self,

Growing up was always a scary thought, but here I am years later as a nineteen-year-old version of you. I’m sure you’ll be relieved to know that you no longer have braces and you’ve finally learned how to maintain that disaster on top of your head you call hair. But those aren’t the only things that have changed.

The intimidating, immense world you used to drown in is now your world, and you’ve done a solid job creating yourself in it. You’ve recognized that you were tired of wasting time feeling anything but happy, and eventually you’ve structured your world to enable you to do so.

You’ve learned to love

You’ve learned to trust other people and to deal with disappointments, breaking your habit of avoiding opportunities in case they disappoint you in the end.

You’ve learned to forgive and forget easily. Regrets hold you down as an unhealthy anchor, and you’ve become a better person from accepting that.

You’ve lost a lot

You’ve lost friendships, relationships, and sometimes even yourself. But hey, you have to lose some to win some.

You’ve fallen in love

Woah, yeah that’s a big one. You’ve actually found your soul mate and he makes you a better person every day.

And the most important one of all,

You want to be happy

You want to wake up every morning with a smile on your face, knowing that life is too short to be anything but happy. You should be so proud of yourself because it took a lot to get to this point, trust me. But you’re a warrior and you’ve conquered a lot of pain, and now you’re fearless. Know that no matter how impossibly hard something may seem, everything gets better because nothing is permanent. Life isn’t meant to be lived without happiness, love, or family. So never forget that and don’t lose sight of happier times ahead.

All in all, the person you’ve become is someone you’ve always wanted to become. You’re carefree, you’re loved, and you’re happy. So to my old self, thank you for being so strong and for hitting “growing up” head on. You should be proud.

Sincerely,

Nineteen-year-old you