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Health and Wellness

To My Mental Illnesses, you can't control me anymore

I will not let you control me any longer.

Taylor Hogeland

Aug 07, 2018

Jacksonville State University

106

Pexels

To my depression, you can't control my life anymore.

There have been many times where I have let you completely destroy my relationships with my closest friends, destroy a wonderful week, and destroy aspects of my relationship with my lover and family members. You've taken over my life, but I'm giving it to God, so you can't control me anymore. I am worthy of living. I am going to be successful. I am going to live a wonderful life and have a beautiful family, and I will not let you convince me any differently.

To my anxiety disorder, you can't convince me that I am unwanted anymore.

Anxiety has been my biggest struggle for the longest. Meds don't make you disappear, but that's okay. I know now that I am, in fact, very loved and cherished by my friends. I know that I am not a burden to my family or friends, despite how hard you try and convince me otherwise. I will not let you keep me from going places I have always loved going to, because I am afraid of how someone may look at me. I won't let you make me lose my beautiful hair ever again.

You have controlled my life for so long, but I am slowly learning to take it back into my own hands with the help of my closest friends, my significant other, my family, and God.

I have to keep reminding myself that things do and will get better with time. I have to remember to pray about things beyond my control instead of worrying myself sick. I love the person I am slowly finding myself to be, and I wouldn't change it for the world. I am finding more confidence in myself than I have felt in years, and I will not let that be ripped away from me.

So as a final say to my mental illnesses,

I will get better. I am loved. I am beautiful, and eventually, you will never make me feel any less than that, ever again.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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