Dear the boy who broke my heart,

I want to say Thank you. Thank you for making me realize I deserve so much better than you. Thank you for showing me what I should tolerate. I am sorry if writing this hurts your feelings and you get mad because you don't want people to know how I truly feel. I deserve to write what I want without you criticizing me. You are the one who made me feel on top of the world and then you tore it all out from underneath me. I guess I should explain this relationship through my eyes.

I recently just broke up with an ex and I was starting my second year of college. I was walking with my friend to her dorm room between classes when another friend of mine stopped me. She asked me if I was single and she told me she has someone she wanted me to meet. The day I met you, I didn't think I would fall that hard but I did. I remember when I opened the door to my friend's dorm and there you were. I was super nervous, but eventually, I let lose. I really thought you thought we were all super weird. I remember staring at you every day after that. Until one day, I got the courage to walk past your dorm room and you asked if I wanted to hang. After that day, we were together almost every day. I slept in your dorm room and I felt safe with you. I remember the day you asked me to be your girlfriend. We were laying down and talking when you called me your girlfriend. I was puzzled and asked you if that means we are together and you said yes.

Six months into our relationship, my grandma died. She was the one person who I counted on. It broke my heart and you were there. I couldn't imagine going through that without you by my side. After she died it changed me, I watched her take her last breath; it killed me inside. You didn't understand that and you kinda pushed the sex issue and it just pushed me farther away. I never fully recovered but I eventually just gave in to what you needed and wanted. I realized how much I did that, how I always put you first. I never did what I wanted, I always made sure you were happy before I was.

We always constantly fought about stupid shit and sex. It got to the point you broke up with me a few times but never for long. One time we broke up, you kissed a friend and groped another, it broke my heart but, I forgave you. The next day, we talked and got back together. This happened constantly, until May when we broke up for a couple of months. I should have just walked away after that but I couldn't. We remained friends but we still acted like we were dating. A month or two later we decided to date but no one really knew that. In August, my grandfather died and that was the last straw for us. We broke up two weeks later. I was hurt but I knew that it was for the best. Just when I accepted the breakup, I found out you were dating my friend. I was angry and hurt more betrayed the anything.

Now we barely talk but I know it's because I don't really want to. I am trying to move on and for the first time in my life, I am happy. I am doing amazing things and I am trying to love again. I want to thank you for the almost two years we were together because I was able to find myself. I am me again and I love it. I wish you the best of luck in your future even if I am not a part of your life anymore.