I thought about you today.
I actually think about you every day. Sometimes I hear your voice in my head when I'm trying to make a the most basic decisions. And if I make a bad one, I can hear you say "I told you that wasn't a good idea," in my head loud and clear.
You would of been proud to see my graduate high school, and even graduate college. When the anniversary of your death rolls around the corner, I try to remember that the reason why you left this earth was because it was your time to go. I do believe you were relieved of some pain, so that is always a bit comforting for me. I know I'm not in the 8th grade anymore and you're not here to help me with my homework over the phone like you use to. But there's still some days when I wish you were here to help me out with the things that are a little more difficult to figure out. I remember the days when I would sit next you and you would just tell me a bunch of different fascinating stories from when you were younger. There were days you would just randomly come over to grandma's house so we could go get our favorite ice cream together. I still go there and get our usual when I come visit.
We would sit and talk for hours about all these beautiful things about life, and I treasured it so much. I realize more now how much it meant to me that you were always there when I needed you. I was about 13 when I got the call. It was my birthday and I was so excited to see you when I got back from my little vacation.
Later that day, at 11:58 p.m., you had passed.
I gained an angel on my birthday. And every year on my birthday I say a little prayer for my special angel watching over me. I could never understand why you had left me on my birthday, but there is a part of me that believes you always wanted me to remember you.
We all have a story of a loved one we have lost, whether it was recent or a long time ago, it's still a loss the sits deep and never goes away. Our angels are watching over us everyday. Remember the LAST chemistry text book you were able to buy for your class that you needed? Your angel made sure you were able to get one. Remember that job you really needed or else you would have been evicted from your apartment soon? Your angel made sure you got that job. Remember that car that almost swerved into your lane and almost hit you this morning? Your angel made sure you didn't get hit.
I know you miss them everyday, I do to, but just remember they will always be there, and they will always watch over you.
Until we meet again,
Your niece,
Amanda
In loving memory of:
My angel, Samuel Feliciano