Hey girl,
It's May 2012 and you are so excited about graduating from high school! You have so much hope, joy, and excitement in your 17-year-old heart, you're about to make it through your first big life accomplishment. You have had dreams about college being the best experience of your life.
In the 11th grade you decided that you wanted to attend Mississippi State University because of its amazing Geoscience program, your goal was Meteorology. (later you'll learn that goals change) In August of 2012, you took the biggest step of your life and went off to MSU, separation anxiety and all.
Today, well you're sitting in a room, now writing a letter to yourself with a full heart, in tears because the memories
Well, girl, you've made to Starkville and you feel invincible– like there isn't anything that you can't accomplish. Little do you know, your life hasn't truly begun yet.
Nowadays, you know what failure looks like and you know how it feels to lose. You know that the little bubble you were stuck in was just a mere figment of what life really was. Life was as real as it could have possibly been for a child like yourself. From then until now, you've had so many bumps and bruises along the way.
Along the way, you'll change your major to Journalism. You'll also make your first F in Biology (which will feel like the end of the world to you) you'll make friends and lose friends, and you'll be judged constantly.
But let me let you in on a little secret, at 21 years old, you're a completely different person than who you were 5 years ago. Looking back on at that one time sophomore year when you were in your dorm crying and you wanted to quit because it was all just too much. If I had one wish it would be to go back, give you a big hug, and tell you that it will all be OK. We would have a long conversation about life. I would tell you to be patient with yourself. Your plans aren't God's plans so trust God more than you trust the future you've planned for yourself. Most importantly, you're 17 and you'd be surprised how fast life goes by, so look up and pay attention to what's in front of you. So, one day, you can reminisce on the good times.
I would tell you that you may feel like a failure now, but you're life only gets better from here. Geoscience wasn't too hard for you, it just wasn't your passion. Your passion is writing, and it is now the biggest part of your life. You're going to become a student leader– a Vice President actually. Mind blowing, right? You're going to meet friends who have the same interests as you. You know how much you love to sing? Well, one day you'll get over that fear of performing alone and win a talent show! Save your money! You are going to stop hiding behind others and you will begin to showcase your many talents. You will sing anywhere, anytime. You will allow people to read you're poetry and they will love it. You will share your opinions about things that matter to you, you"ll live your life unrestricted.
Most importantly I would tell you that you can do it because you are the definition of amazing. These next 5 years is your journey, your time to write your story. Time to take in as much as possible and learn from everything and everyone. Nothing about this voyage is meant to be perfect or easy, so as hard as it may seem now, accept what God allows. Listen to your parents, even though they may fuss at you every step of the way, it's only because they see how amazing you are and they want you to mold into that beautiful young lady. Forgive others that may have wronged you in any way. Holding on to those negative memories will eat away at you. Most importantly Lanecha, forgive yourself. Nothing you have done in life has written you off in God's eyes, so who are you to write yourself off.
At the end of the day, my beautiful queen, I want you to know that you are a bold creature, wonderfully made in His image and there's nothing you can do to change that. So live your life honey, and be glad in it.