Having someone in your family pass away is one of the hardest things someone can go through. Especially if they were young, or if it was sudden. It doesn't hit you. It feels fake. It feels like Something that helps me grieve is writing a letter to them. This article will show you how I personally do it.
Dear Justin,
Your life was taken away so fast. It kills me how fast. I can't even believe it. It feels like the person who took your life away has also stopped all of our lives and is in control now. He took control when he had no right to. I'm hurting, and I know everyone else is, too. Jamie Foxx puts it perfectly in his song I Wish You Were Here when we sings:
"I wish you were here. That's all I know to say, that's all I know to pray.
But sometimes I wonder why
Why can't you still be here with me
I wish God would've waited, a couple more years for you to see
I'm trying to stay strong, barely holding on
I know I'll see you again, but for right now rest in peace"
I've been told you came and left us so early for a reason, and people keep saying this to me. I just don't understand it, nor will I until I'm done grieving. It's so hard to see through the pain right now, but I know one day I'll be up there with you, and we will continue where we left off as if no time has passed.
Since you were my God-Brother, I always saw you as my actual big brother. I knew that if anything ever happened, I could go to you and my other brothers and you guys would be there for me. Now that you're gone, I feel as if a hole in my heart has been made. You made an impact on everyone's life, Justin.
I remember when we were little kids and how excited I would get to come over and play with you, Joseph, and Xavier. I remember all of the games we played and the jokes that were made, you messing with me and calling me a kid when we were only one year apart. I remember you sharing secrets with me and trusting me, and I remember that amazing smile you had that showed nothing but love for everyone around you.
I always saw my life with you in it. I couldn't wait to be as close as our parents are now, I wanted all of us to make our own families and have them hang out every weekend. I wanted us to become successful together and live like we had no cares in the world. This now isn't possible, and it hurts to think that I have to continue living my life without you.
Gun violence has now affected my life personally. I want to find justice in all of this, and I pray that we do. We will because we aren't telling God we have a big problem, we are telling our problem we have a big God.
I love you, Justin, and I will miss you dearly. For now, I will continue to grieve, and I'll continue to pray. But man, I wish you were here.
Love you always,
Jaz
