Dear The girl who walked away,

The story of how we came to be best friends is a pretty epic one. After 3 years of being in the same clubs, the same choir class, and the same soccer team, we finally became friends while on a choir trip to Mexico. We had spent those 3 years not knowing that we were the perfect duo. Not knowing that we were somehow destined to become best friends. Your best friend was also on that trip. And after 16 days in Mexico, the 3 of us had become attached at the hip. You welcomed me into your little gang with open arms. And for a short while everything was perfect. We were all super close, we had the best sleepovers, we had group chats dedicated only to memes, and we had the best inside jokes. We all fit together like pieces to a perfect puzzle. But you and I always had our own puzzle. One where it was just us two. We would have our own sleepovers, we sent each other memes that were just meant for us, and we had our own inside jokes. You were my very best friend. My platonic soulmate, and as we liked to call it, my bestie for the restie. That summer, after only months of knowing each other as best friends, we had the time of our lives. Pool trips, soccer practices, sleepover after sleepover, car rides, movies, ice cream. You name it and we probably did it together. You were one year older than I, and as you were preparing for college, I was preparing for how I would get through my senior year without you. There is always facetime you would tell me. Letters too. I'll text you everyday. These are the things your promised to me. The day we both dreaded finally came. The day you left for college was also my 18th birthday. A day that I should have been so excited for was overshadowed with the sadness that you were not there to celebrate with me. The first few months that you were gone were great. We texted and facetimed. I even came to visit you a few times. You showed me the in and outs of college life. I met your friends. Everything was going great. But then everything changed.

In November, around the one year anniversary of our friendship, life was pretty hard for me. Someone in my family was really sick. And we all knew she wouldn't make it this time. You knew about this too. I spent many moments on your shoulder crying over the pending loss of this amazing human being. In the early days of December she lost her long willed battle to a terrible disease. My friends and family comforted me, surrounding me in a blanket of love and support. But you weren't a part of that blanket. You didn't call. You didn't write. All I heard from you was silence. The silence continued from you for months . I confronted you about it . But you didn't seem to care. I felt as if I had lost a sister.

You weren't there for me when I really needed you. You chose other people before you chose me. You always said that your college friends weren't good for you, yet you continued to pick them over me. I decided long ago that I was going to stop choosing people that stopped choosing me first. That being said I wish you all the best. You are a great human and I hope you can find a great group of people who loved me just as much as I once did. I hope you have an amazing life full of amazing journeys. And its okay if I'm not on them.

From,

The girl you left behind