Denial was the first stage I went through. I refused to acknowledge things out loud. I stayed strong externally, but it was tough. Through the first half of Wednesday, I maintained the denial while going through phases of anger and bargaining. I don't know if I could have been any angrier. But as the day went on, I chose to pay attention to many of the people I know who voted for Donald Trump. It helped bring me a level head, at least. By this point I am in some sort of combination of depression and acceptance, but this stage might last a while. So I write this with as heavy of a heart as ever, but I know that we the people have so much potential for good. Regardless of whom you voted for, now more than maybe ever the easiest route is anger and bitterness toward the other side. And, now more than ever, it is crucial to the betterment of our country that we stray from that and understand each other. For the rest of this letter, and throughout each of your lives, please, I beg you, keep a good heart and an open mind.
To Hillary Voters,
This sucks. I know it does. For many of you, it is difficult to imagine a scenario in which our country shows any darker colors. And I get it. Considering my lack of being any of the types of people Trump targeted, I am as sad as I could be. And after the campaign Donald Trump put together, it is not only reasonable to hate him for the rest of his life, but I can assure you I will too. But he won. There is nothing you can do to change that. And most importantly, it is essential that you do not group all of his voters in with him. I will spend zero time convincing you Trump is an OK guy, but I can assure you many of his voters are. I know that those words seem like blasphemy to what you stand for. But bear with me. I thought the same things as all of you much of the day Wednesday. When I call for everyone to keep a good heart and an open mind, don't think I'm speaking directly to Trump supporters, whom I'm sure you are having a hard time viewing as anything other than ill-hearted and closed-minded. I can assure you that many of them are not. I won't try to convince you that they are the backbone of America and that they're the hardest workers. I won't try to tell you you could never understand their struggle. Both sides have people like that. But I will tell you that many of them are people with good hearts and, yes, open minds. I have seen multiple posts and comments by friends who voted for Trump, saying they too wanted to vote to make the future better. It's true, and you have to understand that. You have to understand that they did not and do not view Trump the same way you do. It can be because they value different qualities higher than the ones you do. This can stem from a lack of knowledge, for some. There are also many who are pro-life for very adamant reasons who see pro-choice as worse than anything about Trump. And such a high number of them want more than anything else to get rid of corrupt politics, something they saw in Hillary. As for supporting Trump directly, many of his voters had good reasons. Trump made it clear he wants to create jobs and lower taxes. The middle class is struggling and is farther behind the upper class than ever. Middle class people want someone to run the country who will actually help them out. They want to be appreciated because they work so hard yet feel like they don't get a voice. To them, Trump heard their voice. Trump would allow them to keep more of their money. Trump would allow more of them to obtain and/or secure jobs and careers. Millions of people are fed up and want better for themselves and their children. Trump makes a big step in that direction in their eyes. Whatever the reason, when it comes down to it, I don't expect any of you to support voting for Trump, but I do expect you to listen to Trump voters. So many of them have good values. So many of them have great things to say. They are not Trump, and if there is one thing most critical here, it is that you remember that. Continue to be there for each other, but choose to be there for Trump voters as well. Get past the anger. Listen to them. Understand them. Don't ever stop working for your cause. It is an important one, but talking down to and despising those on the other side will not help push the cause forward. You must stay strong, and that includes playing your role in unifying this nation. You must do your part.
To Trump Voters,
You won. And you did so fairly. I cannot fault you for that, and Hillary supporters shouldn't either. From this point on, though, you must act as if the battle against Hillary is over, because it is. It is time to bring our country together, something the other side is scared about right now. Hillary supporters could very well be wrong in assuming you to be hateful or divisive. If you think they truly are wrong, prove it to them. Don't get angry with them. They need to not be angry at you, but you also can't be angry at them. As half of our country, you play such a crucial role in making our country better, and I know you want to make the country better. I made it a point to Hillary voters that I think it's imperative they keep an open mind with all of you, and you must know it is equally necessary that you all do the same thing with them. That doesn't just mean tolerating them, it means trying to understand them and find common ground. In my message to Hillary voters, I made it clear that many of you have very legitimate reasons for voting for Trump and that you should not be hated. Now that I'm speaking to you, I have to do what I can to help you understand their hate. One key thing to keep in mind is that you and they are in different positions. They just lost, and you just won. If you think about any other head-to-head competition in life, you know it is easier for the victor to be nice to the loser than the other way around. A lot of Hillary supporters hate you right now. The first step for them in their role in unifying our country is to stop hating you. The first step for you goes hand-in-hand with that. You need to understand them. Trust me when I say, they have good reason to feel how they feel. Your role in helping make things better now is understanding those reasons. Trump has repeatedly verbally attacked many groups of people, and to Hillary supporters that holds more value than the things Hillary has done wrong. I'm not going to tell you that you are wrong for being the opposite of that and despising Hillary too much to vote for her. I understand your hate for her. I, myself, had a difficult time coming around to voting for her. But, because my letter to you should help you take the first step in understanding Hillary supporters, I need to delve a little bit into something I think many of you can get on board with. It is imperative to keep our country safe. Trump's policies on things like the second amendment and immigration probably have you feeling like he is going to help do just that. Now that your side won, I urge you to hear Hillary supporters on what they want to feel safe. You may never get on board with safe zones and political correctness. I'm fine with that, but that's not what I'm going for. Now, please, hear me out the rest of the way. One of the largest social problems in the United States is the encompassing of sexual assault and domestic violence. Donald Trump has had many accusations against him, and I am a firm supporter of his innocence until proven guilty. But I ask you to pay attention to the rhetoric he used throughout his campaign. The rhetoric mattered. Here is a look at a graphic displaying the structure supporting rape culture:
I hope you paid attention to the graphic. I believe that most of you would never cross above the red line in that pyramid, and I am sure that most of you even would not perform the actions in the Degradation tier and maybe even the bottom tier. But pay attention to the bottom tiers because they matter so much. Trump has given those who perform the bottom two tiers a sense of entitlement to continue what they're doing. I'm going to list just a few quotes from him real quick. I don't assume you to support these quotes, and that's precisely why I am listing them. I think you will agree with me that these are bad things to say, so I hope you know I'm not accusing you of supporting these lines:
"26,000 unreported sexual assaults in the military-only 238 convictions. What did these geniuses expect when they put men & women together?"
About Fox head Roger Ailes not deserving being outed at Fox: "[He is a] very, very good person." And what Ivanka should do if sexually harassed in the workplace: "I would like to think she would find another career."
"I just kiss. I don't even wait. And when you're a star... you can do anything. Grab them by the pussy. You can do anything."
About a 10-year-old: "I am going to be dating her in ten years, can you believe it?"
In response to accusation of assaulting Natasha Stoynoff: "Take a look. Look at her. Look at her words. You tell me what you think. I don't think so."
"If Ivanka weren't my daughter perhaps I'd be dating her."
"How much money is the extremely unattractive... Arianna Huffington paying her poor ex-hubby for the use of his name?"
Not to mention he's called women fat, pigs, slobs, and disgusting animals. I can't emphasize enough how important it is that you all take it upon yourselves to not support the type of rhetoric Trump uses. That's the biggest hold-up Hillary supporters have with you. That's what hurts them. A man who says those things was just elected. And I'm not telling you it was wrong of you to vote for him, but it is now up to you to help create a culture where these types of comments are not acceptable. In our country, rape culture is typically a taboo conversation. But think about how many times either you or a friend casually did something in one of the bottom two tiers on that pyramid. It doesn't make you a rapist and it's not your fault that someone else commits rape. But you can make a world of difference if you refuse to condone that type of behavior. Right now, Hillary supporters are convinced that rape culture just got significantly worse, and nothing could be more horrifying. This is the reason these images exist:
To Everyone,
Be loving. Do something kind today for someone, and then do it again tomorrow. It sounds cliche but I'm not joking. If you give one stranger a day a compliment, it could change your life. I know it changed mine. Keep an open mind. I hope that what I just wrote had an impact on you, and I want each and every one of you to move forward in an attempt to bring love to the forefront of our nation. There is no need for hate. The election is over. Hate will do us good no longer. Be nice to those around you. Be compassionate even when you can't understand someone. Be empathetic to those who are hurting. We don't need to celebrate a victory or feel hate in a loss. We need to be good to each other. I ask Hillary supporters to keep at their cause, but be more understanding of the other voters. I ask Trump voters to do their part in assuring the rest of the country that you are part of the fight against the awful cultures that run rampant in our nation. Neither candidate could ever have as much of an impact on each of us as we all do on each other. Keep a good heart and an open mind. Always.
Yours Truly,
Mason
