An Open Letter To All Single Ladies | The Odyssey Online
Start writing a post
Lifestyle

An Open Letter To All Single Ladies

8 Reasons Why Singleness is better than Unintentional Dating

243
An Open Letter To All Single Ladies

When I was single, I often got the question, “Why aren’t you dating… you’re pretty you shouldn’t be single” to which I awkwardly reply, “thanks”. Society tells us that pretty girls date nice guys. However, what if we thought differently. What if we waited to find the guy God has made for us; the one GOD already claims is ours.
Crazy?... maybe Worth it?... Definitely.

So here's some advice to all the single ladies out there, trust me, waiting is worth it.

1. Unintentional dating leads to heartbreak

Listen, friends. When you begin to enter into a dating relationship that is unintentional, it seems like no harm will be done. You aren’t planning anything, so it seems simple, easy… but there’s always a catch. As human beings it is almost instinct that we look for love and appreciation. All too easily, time and time again we fall for people who don’t feel the same way as we do. And, from experience, it is awful. If you begin a relationship in an unintentional manner, you are bringing heartbreak and pain upon yourself. Stay intentional in your relationships and always be sure that your intentions are morally in line with Gods.

2. You’ll be more aware of what you look for in a man.

Ladies, being single allows you to not only focus on God, but it allows you to focus on the standards God sets for young men. Personally, being single allowed me to focus on the character of a godly man. In my time of singleness, I realized that if a man doesn’t strive to represent Ephesians 5, I don’t want to pursue a relationship with him. Singleness is a time period you should be grateful for. Be grateful that you have been given time to focus on finding the man God wants you to be with. Instead of viewing singleness as a burden, recognize the good that comes from being single.

3. You’ll be more secure in yourself

Singleness allows us to take a step back and work on ourselves. Too often, when we pursue relationships we end up losing a part of ourselves in trying to be all that a guy wants. Before entering into a relationship, it’s wise to take a look at yourself… flaws and all and be sure that you are confident in Christ and through that that you have confidence in yourself. When we enter into relationships it is so easy to put that man in the place of God. All too often we end up getting our assurance from our significant other, when God calls us to trust in HIM, not man. Recognize that singleness allows us to find ourselves buried in the grace of Jesus, before we try to find ourselves a man.

4. Unintentional dating leads to a question of boundaries

First off, in all relationships it is KEY to set boundaries. Whether your boundaries are simple, such as never being in a house alone or whether they are more complicated… determining boundaries is SO IMPORTANT. With this, your boundaries should be in line with God’s law. Too often boundaries are used so that we can get as close to sin as possible without actually sinning, however, remember that your goal in a relationship should be to honor God- not to try to push limits and stretch your boundaries. When you throw in the struggle of determining boundaries when dating without a purpose or just to “get to know someone better”, things get messy, quickly. To be safe, it is best to save yourself from hassle… stay single or be intentional.

5. Unintentional dating already proves that your significant other isn’t seeking after God the way they should be

I’ve already touched on this a bit, but when a man begins pursuing you to date, He should be open with his intentions. When a man does this he is showing you that he is taking the relationship seriously, and is striving to be God-honoring by putting your feelings and you above his own thoughts and feelings. Ladies, be patient in waiting for a man who intentionally pursues you.

6. You can lean on God to provide the right guy, in the right time

One of the greatest blessings to being single is being able to throw aside worry. So many girls my age are worried about being single. They think that to be a successful individual they have to be dating a man. And although I'm extremely happy and in love in the relationship I'm in, if my boyfriend wasn't pursuing me and wasn't be intentional, we wouldn't be together. I’d rather be single and trusting in God to provide an Ephesians 5 man, than to unintentionally date for my own pleasure. From my own experiences, I find so much peace in knowing that God is writing my love story even now. It’s a blessing to not have to worry about being single, because I know God has a plan and that all things will come together in His timing. Even though I met the love of my life at eighteen, if God would have not brought us together until we were eighty, I would have been altogether be just as joyous and thankful.

7. Unintentional dating was never in God’s plan

Jesus coming to die for the Church is the greatest depiction of love that we, as Christians, have. Just as Christ pursued the Church; Just as God moves upon sinners for salvation, so we are to pursue our significant others. God is intentional with the relationships He has with his Church. Be like Christ. Be intentional



8. Ending a dating relationship, or not entering one doesn’t mean you can’t be friends

If you have been reading this and you really don’t think your relationship is coming from a God-centered, God-honoring place, in no way am I condemning you. I am merely asking you to examine your relationship with God and with your significant other. Realize that if you choose to end a relationship or not enter into a relationship where you aren’t intentionally dating in a way that is honoring to God, you are saving yourself from heartbreak and unhappiness. Be joyful in knowing that God has a plan.


Friends, Be intentional, know that God has a plan. Cheerfully choose singleness until God chooses to place you in a relationship that honors him.





Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Featured

15 Mind-Bending Riddles

Hopefully they will make you laugh.

197312
 Ilistrated image of the planet and images of questions
StableDiffusion

I've been super busy lately with school work, studying, etc. Besides the fact that I do nothing but AP chemistry and AP economics, I constantly think of stupid questions that are almost impossible to answer. So, maybe you could answer them for me, and if not then we can both wonder what the answers to these 15 questions could be.

Keep Reading...Show less
Entertainment

Most Epic Aurora Borealis Photos: October 2024

As if May wasn't enough, a truly spectacular Northern Lights show lit up the sky on Oct. 10, 2024

19123
stunning aurora borealis display over a forest of trees and lake
StableDiffusion

From sea to shining sea, the United States was uniquely positioned for an incredible Aurora Borealis display on Thursday, Oct. 10, 2024, going into Friday, Oct. 11.

It was the second time this year after an historic geomagnetic storm in May 2024. Those Northern Lights were visible in Europe and North America, just like this latest rendition.

Keep Reading...Show less
 silhouette of a woman on the beach at sunrise
StableDiffusion

Content warning: This article contains descriptions of suicide/suicidal thoughts.

When you are feeling down, please know that there are many reasons to keep living.

Keep Reading...Show less
Relationships

Power of Love Letters

I don't think I say it enough...

461073
Illistrated image of a letter with 2 red hearts
StableDiffusion

To My Loving Boyfriend,

  • Thank you for all that you do for me
  • Thank you for working through disagreements with me
  • Thank you for always supporting me
  • I appreciate you more than words can express
  • You have helped me grow and become a better person
  • I can't wait to see where life takes us next
  • I promise to cherish every moment with you
  • Thank you for being my best friend and confidante
  • I love you and everything you do

To start off, here's something I don't say nearly enough: thank you. Thank you, thank you, thank you from the bottom of my heart. You do so much for me that I can't even put into words how much I appreciate everything you do - and have done - for me over the course of our relationship so far. While every couple has their fair share of tiffs and disagreements, thank you for getting through all of them with me and making us a better couple at the other end. With any argument, we don't just throw in the towel and say we're done, but we work towards a solution that puts us in a greater place each day. Thank you for always working with me and never giving up on us.

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

11 Signs You Grew Up In Hauppauge, NY

Because no one ever really leaves.

28417
Map of Hauppauge, New York
Google

Ah, yes, good old Hauppauge. We are that town in the dead center of Long Island that barely anyone knows how to pronounce unless they're from the town itself or live in a nearby area. Hauppauge is home to people of all kinds. We always have new families joining the community but honestly, the majority of the town is filled with people who never leave (high school alumni) and elders who have raised their kids here. Around the town, there are some just some landmarks and places that only the people of Hauppauge will ever understand the importance or even the annoyance of.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments