Well...it has been a while since we have talked. Let's just say things did not end on the best note with you. Actually, it was horrific, but we have talked one time since all that happened and there are no hard feelings there with you. I'm sure you're wondering why I am writing this if things were mended, but I'm writing this letter for my sake. I have some things I need to say and get off my chest.
I gave you a part of me that nobody else ever had. I put my walls down, all the way down for you. I was certain you would be the one person who would never hurt me or leave me alone (but you did and it hurt. It hurt like hell). I really thought we would make it through all the storms and winds life threw our way (because we had already been through so much together).
Things always went so great for us. We never argued. We would always talk through things. I don't understand when and where things started going wrong. You always knew the right things to say at the right times. And I thought, well, maybe you just were so good with your words - that that's why things were so perfect. But, that wasn't the case with us because your actions always followed up your sweet and thoughtful words (so, no, I can't say that, because I would be lying).
We always said we would never let people come between us, but that is exactly what we let happen. We both did things wrong, but when it came down to it, I did not hurt you the way you hurt me. You literally changed me as a whole person. I have trust issues. I want to be able to believe in someone again, but I just can't (trust me, I've tried). The stupid thing about me is that, obviously, I care way too much because even after all that happened, I still wanted you back in my life.
I finally understand and know I deserve so much better. I'm finally understanding life altogether. You think things will last forever and you'll stand through the weather, but you don't. People change and things end within a blink.
I don't wish anything bad for you. I actually wish you all the best this life has to offer. I won't ever go out of my way to speak to you if I see you, but just know they're aren't any hard feelings. Forgive but never forget. I hope you chose the right paths in life and don't get lost along the way. I tried to help you as best I could, but I was a hypocrite myself for some things after everything happened.
So, onto the main point of this whole letter. I want to thank you for changing me. If you hadn't changed me, I wouldn't now be okay with being by myself. Thank you for showing me I don't need anyone in my life to make me happy. I can be happy all by myself. I wouldn't be as close with my family as I am now because the more time I was with you the less I could be with them. I've learned family over everything. For awhile I strayed away from my family, but now I know family means the whole world. So thank you for everything that happened because I learned so much just by one event that happened with us. You also gave me a wonderful best friend out of everything. I'm glad everything turned out the way they did.
Sincerely,
A changed girl
P.S. If life should ever bring you back my way, I'll know better next time. ;)
