To The Girl Who Is Always Second Best,
If you are anything like me, you can list professional side-kick, wingman, and third wheel to your resume. You were never the first picked in your middle school gym class and you're especially not a guy's first pick. You aren't the prettiest of your friends, and definitely not the smartest. You are probably a little awkward, so sometimes being second is nice because you can slip away unnoticed. You aren't really great at anything, but instead mediocre at a lot of things. If you were a type of clothing you'd be the jean Bermuda shorts. You aren't the cute short shorts or the fancy long pants, but you are just something in between. But, if you are anything like me, you are used to it--being second is a normal thing for you. It happens so often that you really don't think anything about it anymore. It's just another thing that makes you, you know, you.
You become your own worst enemy-- well, I did. I had always heard that "If you aren't first, you're last." This became a mentality that shaped how I viewed myself. Because I wasn't the best at anything, I doubted my own god given talents and gifts. Not only did I doubt my gifts, but I doubted my own self-worth. I felt as if there was this bar of expectations that I kept striving for, but I just fell short--but never too short, I just never reached the bar. I also felt guilty for feeling these things. I knew other people would love to be in my position because they felt as if they were always last. How could I be so selfish to want to be the first when there were people who are in worse spots than I am? At least I could do some things, right?
But what if I told you that you were first? What if I told you were someone's first thought, first priority, but most importantly, someone's first pick? You probably don't believe me because it took me a little bit to grasp it too. But, there is this guy named Jesus and he came to earth just for you. He had you in mind when he was carrying his cross to Calvary. He was thinking of you when he took his last breath. You see it took me a long time to get out of this mindset of "second." It took me a long time to realize that my worth wasn't found in what others thought of me, or how I thought I "ranked" when compared to others. I finally realized that I was a daughter of the one true king. And while I didn't become a model, an amazing athlete, or even a great musician, I realized that I am fearfully and wonderfully made-- and that made all the difference.
Sincerely,
A Girl Who Realized Her Worth
