A few months ago, I started writing about a girl. I did this to share all of the amazing characteristics that she possesses. It felt uplifting. But, more importantly, it felt right. She was a friend of mine. However, something sparked enough of a flame within to scream otherwise. I realized that I wanted more. I wanted her. Unfortunately, I still have yet to finish whatever I was trying to write in the first place.
In fact, after I realized that we were just meant to be friends, I realized I didn't want anything to happen in the chance of ending that relationship. The feelings quickly went away... until I started writing again, about a different girl. And then a different one after that. I couldn’t understand why I was doing this, but each friendship added more ink to the paper.
What sort of person was I becoming? Reminiscing about the traits of so many different girls. After reading my list over again, I couldn’t help but notice something odd.
With everything combined, there was actually something there. I quickly saw what was hitting me square in the face, like Scotty Smalls realizing he was going to get hit when playing catch with his old man. I thought from the beginning that everything that I wrote down was just another reason why I wanted her.
But truth be told, I don’t. I don’t want her, or anyone on that paper.
I want you.
Everything compiled on that paper is what I see in you. Your beauty, your smile, your everything.Three letters. Y - O - U.
Now comes the catch.
I haven’t met you yet. And if I have, and you have already contributed to the list, then we’ve already started one chapter. But something is telling me that we haven’t, and I look forward to the day that I do meet you.
The list does not represent what I look for in you, or what I expect you to possess or bring to the relationship. The list just stands for a symbol; a symbol of hope; of love. I like to believe that a symbol stands as a reminder, and the reminder is simple. I am always adding to it, but am reminded that it will be endless. There is no stop to it.
I will continue to add the things that I willlove about you. Because as I have pointed out earlier, I do not know you. Just know that one day I will be there, head over heels in love with the girl I have been dreaming about. Whether I know you already or not, when that day arrives, I will be there. Pen and paper in hand.
Reading to you, a list of everything that I have fallen in love with. There might even be annoyances on there (please don't be mad). Just remember that it is another reason why I love you. After I finish reading everything, you’ll ask the question.
"Ok, how did you write all of that down?"
And I’ll smile. I’ll smile while I look straight into your beautiful eyes and flip the paper over. The blank piece of paper. Because a pen can't capture your life.
Your heart does. Every single heartbeat is a scratch on the paper. Writing, experiencing, and cherishing. I have been storing pieces paper my entire life for you, saving that parchment for the most special occasion: when I meet you.
And I cannot wait until the day that book begins.