Dear Snoring Spouse,
While you blissfully sleep, I am awake. Awake and tired. Awake enough to start thinking about kicking you out of the bed, literally. As in turning my body, and using both feet to kick you onto the floor. Then, throwing your pillow at you so can head to the couch.
You know I am not always this mean. Typically, our night starts out with "I love you" and kisses before I roll over to get some shut eye. But after numerous hours of listening to you growl and snort, anger starts to build. I begin to get frustrated from the your blaring slumber. I'll admit, I'm a little jealous of your restfulness, too. I'm just so tired. Tired because I need sleep and tired of how the night plays out.
I'm tired of tapping, nudging, kicking, and hitting you to try and get you to stop.
I'm tired of being awake when I need rest.
I am tired of you getting good rest. Yes, I'm starting to get a little resentful. Especially since you're the culprit.
I am tired of the hideous noise I am forced to hear while I should be dreaming.
And lastly, I am tired of you being cheerful in the morning. Furthermore, you asking me "what's wrong" when I'm cranky. Hmmm, I wonder.
I have a solution. Stop it. Stop snoring. I have even researched a few products to try.
They are worth trying!
If you can't do that, then don't sleep. SOUNDS like a plan, right?
Sincerely,
Exhausted Spouse in need of slumber.