Dear High School Senior,
I know you were offered dozens of promises for how great your senior year would be-- "High school is the greatest time of your life," "Senior year is such a blow off; it's honestly the best," "Your last year is going to be so magical and emotional and life-changing," etc. Maybe they have come true, and if that is the case, I am truly happy for you. On the other hand, those promises may not have come to fruition, and that's okay too.
My senior year of high school had its ups certainly, but for the most part, senior year was more taxing emotionally than any prior year. I had already made the decision not to return to my sport, so I didn't have the triumphant last year of senior glory. My clubs weren't fulfilling me the same way they had before. Instead, I had stress everywhere I turned. "Would I be able to afford the colleges I had been accepted to?" "Would I get accepted to the selective colleges I had applied to?" "Would I be happy with the college that worked best within my criteria?" While many of my friends watched their acceptances roll in and happily decided which college to attend, I was playing a waiting game. I watched people who were seemingly worry-free as I continued to grind through my workload in part because my decision was in no way made and in part because my conscience would not truly allow me to cast off all responsibilities. In all likelihood, no one has a wholly carefree senior year, but the grass is always greener on the other side. When I wanted to play the "I feel like I'm having to act like an adult" card, I realized that I was, in fact, an adult.
You are allowed (and encouraged) to have a magnificent senior year, but you should not expect that. It is okay if you are so stressed you lose sleep sometimes. It is okay to worry about acceptances and financial aid. It is okay to feel like you are floundering in all of your unknowns. It is not okay for not having the picture perfect senior year. Many people don't. It is a time of massive transition and personal growth. That's hard. Don't feel pressured to have some unprecedentedly fantastic year. Simply have a year and make the best of the good times you have. Be yourself. Live your life. In the words of a wise friend of mine, "Do what you love and love what you do."
Love,
Someone Who Was There Before