I'll never understand. I'll never be able to wrap my brain around how belittling and humiliating another person made you feel so mighty and powerful. I'll never understand how you sleep at night knowing you made another person's life a living hell day in and day out. I certainly will never understand how you could be so cruel to another human being when you had no idea what they went through on a daily basis. You didn't know me. All you knew was that I struggled with my self-esteem and was therefore easy prey. It doesn't get much lower than kicking somebody when they're already down.
What I've come to realize is that I will never understand, and that's okay. I've come to realize that if you feel the need to put others down to feel big, you have a slew of your own demons to wrestle with, and that's your own problem. In the moment, I felt as though the torment would never end. Each day that I faced walking down the hallway while you stared at me with cold daggers and spewed hateful words and names, I stared my fears right in the face. I emerged with a bruised psyche, but also with more resilience, grit, and tenacity than ever before, all because of your ridicule. I persevered. I became successful. I took the high-road, and despite your constant efforts to tear me down, I came out on top.
More important than any of that, I became a kind and compassionate person. I'm generous, considerate, and unselfish; because I know exactly how awful it feels to be taunted and excluded. Since then, I've made a promise to myself that I would never make another person feel that way. I will continue to advocate for kindness and tolerance in hopes of alleviating the effects that people like you have on others.
While I have zero respect for you and how you choose to treat people, I refuse to be consumed by hatred. I absolutely refuse to stoop to your level. After all, as strange as it sounds, I wouldn't be who I am today if it wasn't for your maltreatment. To you, I was a know-it-all. Now, I clearly see that I am intelligent and eager to learn. According to you, I dressed like a librarian. Looking back, I'm glad I respected myself enough to dress in a way that I felt comfortable and classy. I know now that none of what you said to me had any merit, and it certainly does not define who I am.
My fate lies in my own two hands, and I'm incredibly proud of the person I am today as well as the one I'm becoming. That is something you can never take from me. I have risen above your abuse and have grown into a bold, strong-willed person; and for that, I thank you.
"I am the master of my fate, I am the captain of my soul." -William Ernest Henley
