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A Letter To My Future Husbands Exes

I am here to thank you, not bash you. No worries.

Crawford Elizabeth Shanks

Dec 27, 2016

Birmingham, Alabama

A letter to my future husbands exes:

Thank you for letting my husband go. Thank you for finding his imperfections too much for you to handle. I am grateful you were able to learn from him, but more grateful he learned from you too. I know people come and go, and I know that when this happens you are able to take or leave the things they offer you in this crazy world, so thank you for leaving all of those things for me to take. I do not know what you went through during your relationship with him, nor do I know the cause of all of your fights or disagreements, but I need you to know your fights and disagreements you experienced have turned into love and a handful of many good decisions we are making, together.

Not to be rude, but his empty promises may have sucked for you, but for me they do not. They are promises kept and made for me to cherish. If age was a factor and you are blaming your failed relationship on the both of you being “too young,” and if you have hopes that the different paths you both took to mature to end up back together take a second and think. Also know that God works in mysterious ways, and if you are thinking there is a reason behind your paths crossing one day because the both of you are meant to be, you might be right.

If this happens and I am not standing there with him or he is standing alone allow God to work. If not, walk away. I think it’s the ‘not knowing’ of the past with person you are with that may strike you to feel this way, and this is normal. But the not knowing is what is making me say this to you; whoever you are.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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A Letter To My Future Husbands Exes

I am here to thank you, not bash you. No worries.

Subscribe to our Newsletter

All names should be "unisex names."

1. Communicating via email can be awkward.

2. Appointments usually accompany weird looks.

3. Introducing yourself to someone is never without a hitch.

4. You’ve probably thought about changing your name.

5. You’re often asked why you have the name you do.

6. You get excited when you meet someone of your gender with your name.

7. You feel awkward when you meet someone of the opposite gender with your name.

8. You’ve had someone say to you, “I knew a [your name], but they were [your opposite gender].”

9. You’ve heard a bad joke/pick-up line or two about your name before.

10. People are surprised when they see you.

11. You’re extra sensitive to other unique or unisex names.

12. You’ve fought with your parents about it.

13. All things considered, you’re happy your name makes you unique.

You know that all of these things apply to you. You'll just never tell.

I get it... I'm pale.

1. At least I can't lose you in a crowd!

2. Oh my goodness your skin is like glow-in-the-dark.

3. Can't you just get fake tan?

4. Do you tan or just burn?

5. Your kids are going to look like Casper the Friendly Ghost!

6. *holds arm against your arm* Look how much darker I am compared to you!

7. *holds pale arm against another pale arm* Aw, at least you're darker than her!

8. I laid out by the pool almost every day over break!

9. I haven't used sunscreen since I was, like, five.

10. *adjusts selfie lighting to their face* Oops, where'd you go??

11. *after working out* Your face is SO red!

12. *wears white* Look! You're all one color!

13. You need to get some sun.

14. Aren't you excited for summer?

The struggle bus is real.

1. Child prodigies:

2. Hearing other musicians in the practice room next door and accepting that you will never be as talented as them:

3. That anxiety that takes over before every performance:

4. Taking a million 0 credit classes:

5. When there's a paper due the next day, but you have to attend yet another concert in order to pass a 0 credit class:

6. When your friends try to encourage you after a performance, even though you are criticizing everything in your mind:

7. Knowing that there's always that one professor during juries:

8. The oh-so-attractive band/choir uniforms:

9. Realizing that a college campus is maybe not the best atmosphere to finish your latest composition:

10. Hearing "Oh, you sing opera? I LOVE Phantom of the Opera!" for the hundredth time:

11. When people think finals week is a breeze for you.

12. When you're drowning in the stress that comes with 18+ credits (and not to mention all those 0 credit classes) and people ask you how you are:

13. When it all comes down to it, though, you know that at the end of the day, music is your passion:

Because you need it in your life.

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6. holds arm against your arm Look how much darker I am compared to you!

7. holds pale arm against another pale arm Aw, at least you're darker than her!

10. adjusts selfie lighting to their face Oops, where'd you go??

11. after working out Your face is SO red!

12. wears white Look! You're all one color!