Dear Anti-Feminist Woman,
I don’t believe you.
Let’s take a closer look at your argument: You agree with the feminist idea that men and women should have equal pay, but do not think women should be discouraged from being stay-at-home mothers. You argue that women should not have to dress provocatively to feel liberated and sexually confident. You say there is nothing wrong with wanting a husband who provides for his family while his wife takes care of the house and children. You believe in old-school relationships, but now that the fourth wave of feminism has struck, we might as well say goodbye to chivalry!
Now, let’s take a closer look at the actual definition of feminism. The dictionary defines feminism as, “the advocacy of women's rights on the grounds of political, social and economic equality to men.” When you do not support an idea, you are essentially supporting the opposite of that idea (i.e. if you support the Democratic party, you therefore do not support the Republican party). Therefore, as an anti-feminist, you do not support 1) political rights for women, 2) social rights for women or 3) economic equality between men and women. What is the point of pitting yourself against your own gender? Are you just trying to be different? Or do you actually not believe in basic rights for women?
A true feminist knows there is nothing wrong with wanting to be a stay-at-home mom. There is nothing wrong with a woman who wants to take care of her children, go to all of their recitals and school plays, keep the house clean, cook healthy meals and take care of herself! A lot of women dream of getting to this point someday, but often times, it is impossible because they do not have husbands/partners who support them financially or emotionally. And that is why we need feminists who support women balancing it all—a job, a college degree, children, home maintenance, mental and physical health, etc. Other women could never stay home all day; they want to be in the work place, and I’m sure that depends on what kind of job one has. My mother worked as a nurse/counselor for pregnant women in a moldy, poorly renovated office building for over 20 years. I’m sure she would have much rather been a stay-at-home mom if our family had the means, but she had to work to help support the family’s finances. If my mother were an astronaut or a TV star on the Travel Channel or a professor at a beautiful college, she probably wouldn’t want to spend so much time at home, but I don’t know that for sure because I can’t speak for someone else. (And neither can you!)
There are, however, certainly other kinds of radical feminism and radical feminists whose opinions are so strong and so specific that they should have their own titles (kind of like different religions) that I do not talk about in this article because said radicals do not always exemplify true feminism in its simplest form. On the other hand, it is safe to say that feminists in general support all women, not just women who have jobs or single women or conservative women or women who love sex or women who don’t want kids or women who want ten. Feminism = men and women who support equal rights for all women.
I will end on this note: Mary Wollstonecraft, an English writer born in 1759, once wrote, “I do not wish them [women] to have power over men; but over themselves.” This statement is a clear definition of what feminism means. If you still disagree with everything I’ve written in this short article explaining real feminism in its simplest form, then I will believe that you are anti-feminist.
Love,
A Feminist