When you really love someone, you will do anything and everything for that person. Even if it means putting them first and yourself second. Time and time again.
It's okay to love someone with all you have, but it's not okay to lose yourself while trying to be the perfect person for them. And in all honesty, when it is the right person, you won't find yourself having to try so hard to be the person that they want you to be... you won't ever have the feeling of always falling short.
Many people will tell you that walking away is one of the hardest things you will have to do. While there is no doubt that it is a difficult decision, staying away is even harder. Knowing in the back of your mind that this person is not right for you, but still loving them with all you have..
Whether it's been days or months that have gone by, when you see their name come across your phone screen your heart still drops. When out of the blue they ask to see you, you do not hesitate to say yes. And before you know it, the cycle begins all over again. Time apart has a way of making the good times seem sweeter than they ever were, and the bad times a little less harsh than they actually were.
You hangout a few times and things seem to be going well, almost as good as things were when you two first fell in love. You look forward to the good morning texts again, the random things you learned to love with just that person.. But, it never lasts. Before you know it, they're angry over something and you watch them leave again.
While you're probably used to them leaving, and knowing they will more than likely come back, it does not make it any easier. But, the truth is-- you should not be used to someone coming and going as they please, simply because they know you love them and will always be there. Regardless of anything. They are the person you will drop everything for at 3 a.m., the one you want to call when you get the best and worst news. But why? They only call when it's convenient for them. They decide when they want you in their life. They know that at the end of the day, you will always be there. But, your relationship lies solely on their ways.
Loving someone who is toxic for you is one of the hardest things, and learning to let go is even harder. You must remember that when the right person comes along, they will not leave you wondering. They won't leave and come back. They won't make you feel that you need to change as a person.
So the next time they text you out of the blue asking to see you... be strong enough to stay away. Let the last time be the last time. When the right person comes into your life, you will wonder why you ever put up with all that you did.
