We often feel the happiest when we are surrounded by people. But what happens when those people affect you in a negative way and bring you down? These are the toxic people in your life. These people emotionally affect you with their drama. They make all of their problems somehow seem like yours, even if you are not connected in any sort of way. They make you feel as if you are doing something wrong in your life, and they are living their lives the 'right' way. You may dread these people, or feel completely exhausted after coming in contact with them. You constantly feel like you are in a cycle of trying to mend fences with them, trying to fix whatever may be left of your relationship. My advice? Let go of the toxic people.
You are in control of your life. You do not need someone telling you every flaw you have. You are aware of these flaws. These flaws are what make you unique. You have enough critics in the world when it comes to school and work, so why would you keep one around and give them the label of a friend or significant other? They do not deserve that, and quite frankly, neither do you.
Sometimes, a large circle of friends is not always the best. It is ok to have a few good friends. Would you rather have ten pennies or two dimes? You are allowed to make the decision who stays in your life and who does not. There is no rule stating that just because they were part of your life before, they have to continue to be now. Things change. People change. YOU change. Turning twenty does this weird thing where you start to finally realize what's important, and what's not. Getting a degree? Important. Entertaining friends who do not support you? Not important. You should not live your life according to someone else. You are on your own time and your own path. The people in your life should be helping you reduce stress, not create it.
You don't owe them an explanation, either. They honestly probably know how shitty they have treated you, and are surprised you are actually doing something about it. Reminisce on the good times, but leave them in the past. Be honest with yourself and with them if you are confronted. Surround yourself with those who truly care about you and be open about meeting new friends. With new life opportunities comes new people (potential friends). There is a time to be the nice person, and then there is the time where enough is enough.
You are doing this for you. For your own good. You are so used to putting the feelings of this toxic person first, you forget that you even have a say. This is YOUR life. Think about what YOU need. You can always have a special place for these toxic people in your heart and in your memories, just not in your life.
