10 Things I Learned After Living With My Girlfriend For A Month | The Odyssey Online
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10 Things I Learned After Living With My Girlfriend For A Month

I love her dearly, but when you move in with someone, you learn things in uncharted territory.

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Alex Kurtz

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When you first start to date someone, you usually spend the first few months learning about each other and adjusting to having a significant other in your life. When you move in together, even if it is just for a short amount of time, things are different for the good and the bad.

Guys, here are some things to look out for so you can be prepared for what is to come, a move-in boot camp in a way. Also, I will probably be in the dog-house for this so just know that I took one for the team.

1. Face masks are everywhere.

Face masks can make you feel refreshed. I get that. Let me tell you one thing guys: you best be mentally ready. The moment your back is turned one night, you will glance back to your girlfriend with an avocado on her face. Some weak-minded individuals are not prepared for this, but you must stay strong. Her face will look good when its done (not that it doesn't look good all the time).

2. They can be messy.

Luckily, I was prepared for this because we both are not the most organized people when it comes to rooms, but for a lot of guys, they are not ready for the scatter of clothes and makeup brushes. Put your helmet on, Private, and be ready to embrace the storm.

3. You will be gassed.

PSA: Girls do fart. When you first start dating, they will not throw gas grenades at you, but you wait good sir. Oh, you wait. The moment you earn their trust, you will get gassed hard in the middle of the night. You can retaliate with chemical warfare of your own, but you will lose. A retreat is the only option.

4. You learn their pet-peeves.

Everybody has that one thing that drives them mad. Your girlfriend might be the sweetest living being on the face of the planet and I guarantee you that one thing you do will make her go insane.

I learned really quickly to not throw the towel on the floor, and trust me, you will know when she finds yours. Batten down the hatches, soldier, and be prepared to stand your ground, and by that I mean go hang up the towel.

5. You will learn their aptitute...or inaptitude for cooking.

Some girls can cook, and some, well...not so much. It is fine if they do not find enjoyment in cooking, after all, it is 2018 and gender stereotypes are garbage. If they do not cook though, that means you better learn how to operate in a mess hall kitchen, soldier, or your ass is eating microwavable chicken nuggets every night.

Thank god I learned how to cook when I was younger because those chicken nuggets would not be good for my already not-so-great figure.

6. You must learn to communicate verbally.

You both are under the same roof now gents, that means texting and Snapchat does not fly (unless you are weird and Snapchat stuff to each other while in different rooms). You will have to learn to pick up on her body language and tone because the same sentence could mean three or more possible things depending on the tone, and you are expected to know the difference.

The fact that I have to put this is kind of sad, to be honest, but I know some people out there, especially younger ones, do not understand how to interact with people, even if it is your significant other.

7. Do not wake the sleeping bear.

Fellas, if she is taking a nap, I do not care what you want to do. You let the woman sleep. End of discussion.

8. The period process

When you do not live together, the period is more of a "Do you need anything? I can get it."

When you live together, prepare for a D-Day invasion of FEELINGS. The emotions will swing, the cravings are real, and you are there for all of it. Stay strong and give her affection and those peanut-butter pickles or whatever weird thing she is craving (do NOT question it just go get them) and you will weather the storm.

9. They will want an animal of some sort.

Max

They will convince you through tooth and nail to get an animal, whether its a cat, dog, lizard, etc...The picture above is Max. I applied to adopt him. He is a three-year-old husky/corgi mix and the sweetest boy.

Guys, this will happen. If you do not want a pet, prepare to fortify that beachhead son.

10. You will get closer to each other.

Even with all of these things, remember that they are your significant other. Living together is a big step and you will get closer from it in the end.

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