For the last 11 months while in an accelerated nursing program, I've also been planning a wedding. Crazy, right? Many people throughout this time have praised me for handling stress so well, and excelling in school. They have no idea. The stress, the crying, the money.
Here, is what planning a wedding has taught me the past year.
It's not YOUR wedding: Contrary to what you and your spouse think...it's everyone else's wedding. Or that's what they make you think. It's your parents day, your spouse's parents day, the bartenders day....EVERYONE'S DAY!
You'll never fight more with your spouse than during this time: My fiance and i have been together for 4.5 years and rarely fight. However, planning this wedding has made WWII look like a playground tiff.
You don't have as much in common as you think: Again, my fiance and I are extremely compatible, and at the beginning we thought it would be a breeze...until we discovered the differences that we share..which is A LOT. Whether, music, traditions, locations...you are not the same person so prepare to compromise.
Everyone else seems to think their opinion more important than yours: You'll get a lot of passive aggressive "it's your wedding do what you want...BUT" insert random opinion here and wait for argument when you disagree.
Choosing a first dance song isn't as easy as you think: Our final DJ meeting is this week and we're still flip flopping on what song to dance to as our first dance. Every love song you hear will seem like "the perfect song". Even the "perfect song" wasn't the perfect song!
Inter-cultural weddings are the most annoying, and tedious weddings to plan: Take it from me. Every tradition from the old country, or island that you've never heard of will come into play, and prepare for possible banishment should you not adhere to them....and adhere to them properly.
There's no such thing as a "small wedding": When i first got engaged i pictured a small wedding of immediate family and only super close friends i.e town hall ceremony and cute backyard little party followed by a huge honeymoon with the money we would've spent on a huge wedding. I now have a 130 person wedding, which compared to some is super small and reasonable, but to someone who wanted what i did originally...this is a mob scene.
Flowers cost the same as an organ transplant: Well, i'm not sure if that's true. But it seems like it! For things that will die, and you'll only stare at for a few hours...they cost thousands, yes thousands of dollars. Simple me, i wanted fake flowers..and was called cheap. Now i'm poor. Kidding, sort of.
If you're lucky your bridal party will be your saving grace: I'm lucky enough to have amazing bridesmaids who don't give me crap about anything, who support me, and do whatever they can to help .SHOUT OUT TO MY GIRLS!
The earlier the better: Do the big things early in the engagement so you don't have to freak out and do big and little things. You'll go insane, more insane i mean.
The stress isn't worth it: I know you can't help but be stressed. Trust me, I know. It isn't worth it though. Everyone else isn't stressing, just you. You suffer the anxiety, crying, yelling ect. Try to relax. I didn't relax, i haven't relaxed, and now i'm on the hot mess express.
It'll be here before you know it: All the nonsense, planning, paying, arranging...it'll go by like that! I feel like he just proposed in Costa Rica, and now we're 3 weeks away. Where did the time go? Or my money for that matter...just kidding...sort of.
For better or worse, it should be the best damn day of your life this far. After all the stress, crying, and all that nonsense, this day is really about you and your spouse. Don't let anyone tell you different, or bully you into doing things you don't want, or keep you from enjoying your day. I know it's super stressful, but hopefully, it'll be amazing and totally worth it.
The wedding planning is a wonderful thing (said no bride ever!!), but try to enjoy it, and remember it's leading up to a happy day.