Six months ago, I moved out of the house I grew up in and in with my boyfriend. You're either thinking: "Oh no, you're crazy," or you're thinking, "That's great!" While the decision was a hard (and quick) one to make, it's turned out to be the best decision I could make for myself. While living with your S.O. is great, you also learn a lot in the process. So here are some things I've learned on this journey.
1. If you think you'll see your S.O. more, you're probably wrong.
One of the things I worried about the most before moving in with my boyfriend was that we would always be on top of each other and butt heads. Sometimes, it's difficult to have your own space when you're sharing it with someone else but realistically, we see each other just as much as we did when we were living separately. We work, we hang out with our own friends and usually reconvene at the end of the day. No damage done.
2. You will learn more about your S.O.
Whether you've been with your S.O. for months or years before you live together, there will always be something new to learn. You'll learn how they wake up in the morning (one alarm, hit snooze three times, lay in bed until the very last minute).
3. You have your best friend available at your fingertips.
Whether I come home from a terrible day at work, I have the worst case of writer's block ever, or I just want to talk, I have my best friend at home waiting for me...or I know that he'll be home, eventually. There's comfort in knowing that you have support when you need it the most.
4. Your habits change.
Things that you used to do alone, you now do together. For example, cleaning the room is now a two-person job. Taking out the garbage, doing laundry, etc. Everything is done differently and it's more efficient.
5. There are bad days.
Obviously through social media, we portray the best versions of ourselves. Nobody sees the frustration after a long day at work, a misplaced attitude because someone isn't feeling well or because you have too much going on. Living with someone makes it difficult to just sit in your room by yourself and ignore everyone, you're forced to face any problems you have, head on.
6. Planning.
I plan more now than I ever have. We make dinner plans, cleaning plans, life plans, etc. If it can be planned, you name it, we're planning it. I'm immensely more into planning than my boyfriend but we both know what needs to be done and plan accordingly.
7. Sharing.
I'm the oldest of 4, so sharing is something you pick up along the way when you have siblings. However, when you live with someone, you share everything. You share your bed, your food (you can't just make dinner and leave someone else to fend for themselves), your time, etc. Long story short, you share everything.
8. Life is different.
Life is so different when you don't live with your parents. To talk to my parents, I have to call them or send them a text. Sometimes, I go a month without seeing my parents, which is definitely a culture shock when you live with them for all of your life, leading up to this moment. You learn to appreciate the time when your parents would set up your doctor appointments, because now you have to do it yourself.
9. Some things may not be ideal...
You learn to adapt your patterns, based on their patterns. For example, your S.O. may get up super early in the morning with three alarms...you learn to adapt to that and go to bed earlier or figure out a way to stay asleep longer.
10. You love a little more.
This is probably one of the most important things I've learned. You love the person you live with a little more for the little things they do everyday. Maybe they knew you would have a long day at work, so they start dinner for you. Maybe they had a day off, so they cleaned up. At the end of the day, it's the little things.
Living together isn't for everyone. Make sure you're prepared, you're ready, and that you and your S.O. can handle this next step. If you're taking the leap, good luck!
