It's important in life to have that one person you can count on. They're someone who advises you, who guides you, who you go to when you've fallen down. For me, that person has always been my father. Without fail, when I've encountered one of life's many problems, I've always run to the comforting arms - and wisdom of - my dad. I've found that I can distill many of his pieces of advice into about five tenets which I've found exceedingly helpful in my own life's journey. I figured I would share them here with you.
1. It's never as bad as you think
Confused Parks And Recreation GIF - Find & Share on GIPHYGiphyCliche? Yes. Do I need to hear it though? Yes. I have a tendency to panic when things don't go the way I planned. I've been anxious over the silliest things - friends not responding to me, tests I *thought* I bombed, organizations to join or quit. I've also had my fair share of moments over more serious things - am I on the road to failure? Did I do the right thing? Did I mess up a connection so badly that it will haunt me forever? In either case, my father has had the same advice for me. It's over, and it's likely nothing to worry about. Turns out, 99.999% of the time, he was right. A good example was selecting classes before first year of college. I panicked because I did not get the class I wanted, absolutely terrified about my grade. My dad smiled as he watched my anxiety bubble over, and told me everything would work out. It did. I ended up having the best semester of Chemistry in my academic career, with one of the best professors (in my opinion). I even made quite a few friends in that class as well. Remember, when you're at the point where you feel as if you can't think yourself out of it and the world is ending, always realize that 99.999% of the time, you'll be a-okay.
2. Face your mistakes
GiphyI think this is something that we often forget in the culture of social media, where everything is anonymous and a problematic someone can be ghosted at a moment's notice. It hurts to face your mistakes, but it's often the best course of action. I learned from example in this one. I've seen my dad make mistakes, and when he does, he always faces the problem, acknowledges his fault, and apologizes. When I've been honest with him, I have always received honesty in return. A policy of honesty is always a good move. Suck it up, apologize, and fix it. Don't sulk, don't hide, face the problem. In that way alone you can find closure for yourself.
3. Always keep a cool head
GiphyMy dad is a master salesman. I'd sincerely hope he would be, considering working with customers is a big part of his job. One thing I have noticed throughout my eighteen years with my father is his uncanny ability to control his emotions and remain civil with all he comes across. He's always told me, "Eleni, never get too emotional with people you don't know." I learned this lesson the hard way by getting upset in front of a teacher in high school about a test and then having that teacher subsequently take a poke at me afterward about it. People will often forget the inner you in favor of remembering a less-than-flattering outburst you had in front of them. Against all odds, hold in those tears and that rage. When you get home, let loose, but don't let anybody but you see. Your vulnerability is yours alone, because people are often unkind and will judge you for it. Unfair, I know, but having experienced it myself, I figured I'd point it out.
4. Approach a problem externally
GiphySomething my dad would always tell me to consider when I approached him with a problem was to think of it as if I was advising a friend. How would I speak to them? What would I tell them their course of action should be? Just as it's often never as bad as you think, 99.999% of the time when advising your friend there's a lot less emotion and a lot more logic involved. The problem in that scenario no longer affects you and instead another person, and it is always easier to think outside of the box when oneself isn't involved. You care about your friend - why shouldn't you care about yourself enough to advise yourself the way you would someone close to you? Don't let emotion rule the day. Use your brain, and pretend you're advising your friend. Call one up, too, if you need it.
5. He's one number away
GiphyBesides 'One Number Away' being a fantastic piece of country music by up-and-coming artist Luke Combs (seriously, go take a listen), know your person is there for you. They can't help if they don't know what's going on, and they're likely to listen to you and take you seriously. My dad does this. I've called him at all hours of the day with the strangest and most trivial problems and requests, and he has always made time for me. Sometimes, it's not even advice. Sometimes, you need someone to just listen. My dad was my 'one number.' Who is yours?
I hope you've taken away something, and always remember, it is usually never as bad as you think. Take it from me. I love to worry and fret, and as you've read, my dad always keeps me in check. Be your 'keeper-in-checker' (is that a word?) and always hold your head high. Make your goals come true, stay focused, and don't get too caught up in the little things! Stay stress-free and have a happy 2019!
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