Last night I had a very interesting conversation with my sister. We had gotten into an argument where I said some very hurtful things. I had a lot of thing going on in my mind and in my life that it ended up with me directing all that stress and frustration onto her.
As we talked I realized she needs me to be there for her. We're both busy people and when she's home I'm not and vice versa. Sometimes when we spend time together all I do is talk. I talk about my life about what happened in class or how I'm feeling. I ask how she's doing but once she starts telling me - I jump right in saying how I've had a similar experience or can relate to her. But sometimes she just wants me to listen. She just wants me to hear her vent and just to listen.
It made me realize that I'm not always the best listener.
I think sometimes in the midst of trying really hard to relate to others, I end up just talking about myself. Which I know, is probably very annoying.
It's a change I have to make in order to be more empathetic with others and really understand what they're feeling. It's taken me time to realize that sometimes people don't want this perfect advice that might fix all their problems. Sometimes people just need a shoulder to lean on and a person who is willing to be there and listen about the stuff they are going through. They want someone who is just there with them throughout the confusion of life.
It's interesting because I only do this with people who are close to me. At school, I keep to myself so I feel like once I'm with my loved ones I have to release all my energy and talk my head off.
But I'm going to start practicing the art of listening. Just yesterday after listening to my sister, it felt like I could relate to her in a very different way. I really understood what she felt, in a way I hadn't taken the time to listen to in a long time.
So note to self: listen more and talk less because it might be the best thing you do.
