When the going gets tough, distract yourself. Or don't?

Among the many pieces of advice people will give when you are going through a rough patch, they will tell you to distract yourself. Go out with friends. Exercise. Pick up a new book or TV show. Just keep yourself and your mind busy—all to not think of the thing(s) causing your difficult time.

I have a love/hate relationship with distracting myself. When my feelings are raw and come to me full-force, I find that, one, it is hard to distract myself in the first place and two, it comes to backfire on me eventually. Having a breakdown is a whirlwind of emotions and they often come out of nowhere. You can be perfectly fine while sitting down, enjoying a binge of Netflix, and the next minute, you're out of breath from the brick wall of sadness that just hit you. When something of that intensity comes to you, it's next to impossible to stop yourself from feeling all of it and to find something to distract you. It's like a mental and emotional trap is holding you down from even moving from your physical position. And I'm sure as heck not going out to the public to display my artistically blotchy face for all to see.

Another reason why I let myself feel instead of being distract is because it all eventually blows up in my face. I naturally bottle up my emotions. I think I do this because I'm sure that people don't want to hear me cry "woe is me" for two hours straight. Everyone deals with their own issues, and I'm not alone in what I'm feeling. Being a part of an egocentric culture, it's easy to think that whatever you're going through is a battle that has never been fought. I'm still trying to open up because I know there are a multitude of people who are willing to sit through my pity party and because my breakdowns are multiple times worse if I don't allow myself to feel it in the first place.

I find it best to distract yourself during your high times or ups. In these times, you're already feeling okay and can muster up motivation to get out and do something. It's easier to continue manifesting positive emotions, rather than pulling them out during negative times. You can leave your distraction feeling good, and the snowball effect takes place, so it's best to wisely choose the time of your distraction.

Let yourself feel what you need to feel before you try to cover it up. Embrace the wide range of human emotion. There is a time and place for everything. Constantly trying to mask something will usually end up backfiring on you in a big and not so pretty way. Try to stay strong in the tough times, and allow yourself to feel happy even if it feels so out of reach.