I don’t like my body.

How many times a day have you said that to yourself? I admit that I say this way too often. Living in a culture that advertises the message that being skinny is the only way to be pretty, it’s hard sometimes to love ourselves for who we are as individuals and the parts about us that make us unique. And it’s not all about looks, either. The same goes for personality and interests. However, loving yourself is necessary.

It took me 20 years before I realized that I don’t need anyone to tell me that I’m pretty, smart, funny, or talented. I know that I am, and I reassure myself of it every day. All through high school and my freshman year of college, I thought that I was only worth what everyone else valued me at. If boys didn’t flirt with me, I thought it was because I was doing something wrong. I over-analyzed and criticized myself constantly. Does my makeup look bad? Is my outfit not cute? Should I do my hair differently?

It wasn’t until the fall of my sophomore year in college that I realized that I don’t need a stamp of approval from anyone. My life will not be determined by the preferences of others. I learned to embrace everything about myself that I originally deemed unappealing.

I started telling myself positive things about my body. Instead of pointing out spots where I thought I needed to lose weight, I pointed out spots that I thought were really pretty. The more I looked at my body in a positive light, the more confident I became. I even forced myself to go out in public without any makeup on, and I ended up loving it so much that I continue to do so to this day. I still wear my makeup and love putting it on, but now I don’t feel so embarrassed or ashamed of my naked face. I love my natural look.

I started to not care what other people thought of me. There is absolutely no way that I can please every single person I come in contact with. Conflict is inevitable. When I would let other people’s opinions get to me, I felt sick. It was a toxic cycle of me putting myself down and having a constant sense of negativity flow through my veins every single day. It got exhausting. I learned to let it go for my own health, and it worked. I can say that I am a much happier person now that I have learned to not let the words of others negatively affect me.

I started to love myself for everything that made up who I was. I regained my sense of identity and picked up some confidence along the way.

Loving yourself is the key to living a happy and healthy life. I know this is easier said than done, but don’t let someone rob you of your confidence or sense of self. You must stay true to who you are and realize that you, just like every other person on this planet, are not perfect and never will be. You may as well embrace the perfect imperfections that make you who you are and turn them into perfections in your mind. Don’t be afraid to love yourself.