Relationships are as complicated as they are enjoyable. To have someone you know will put a smile on your face and make the horrible times good and good times even better. In order to have that peaceful lifestyle, people will go through heart break before they find the one who can give them that feeling. But heartbreak is good, and very important. It means your learning about yourself. Every "failed" relationship is an important one because each one teaches you a new lesson about reaching those great times.
Intimate relationships reveal a great deal about you and the person you are close with. In my life, I have been in love and have had my heart broken. But with each heartbreak or love I have learned more about myself than I thought. Intimate relationships are important because they show how you feel about yourself. People desire a certain type of love because that is what they think of themselves. People who are in an abusive relationship, verbal, physical or otherwise, are there because that is what they think they deserve.
Stephen Chbosky, the author of "Perks of Being a Wallflower," wrote, “We accept the love we think we deserve.” This is undoubtedly true. Those in happy relationships, with a good person, are happy with themselves and know what they deserve. Those who stay with their partner, even when they don't want to, are afraid no one will ever love them again.
Dating and looking for love does not come fast. People can become infatuated with their first serious relationship and believe it's love. This is also a good lesson about yourself. It means you are ready and want to be mature enough to allow a special person into your life. It can be hard to open up to someone else, especially your first relationship like this. This shows that you want someone to do the same because you are ready to be loyal. It is one thing to date, but love takes commitment and a loyal partner, not just physically but mentally too. It is a big step to give them that and a big sign of maturity as well.
The end is one of the most significant parts of any intimate relationship. It may be sad to lose that "love" but it is even worse to hold on. Letting go when you know it is not right is a sign that you respect yourself enough to know you can do better. Holding on even when you aren't happy is understandable because it can be scary to have to redo the process of finding love all over again.
But it is better to let go. You learn about what you want in a partner. As each "failed" relationship ends, you are closer to finding the right one. But no relationship is a failure, is it? Each one teaches you about yourself and how to judge people. Sure , that girl or guy may be hot and the life of the party, but if they are not ready to commit and you are then you know they are more focused on themselves right now than you. That's alright, don't wait around for them, find someone who wants what you do.
Additionally, a break-up can show your character. If you are going around bad mouthing your ex because they broke up with you, it shows what kind of person you are. Sure, it can be okay to be upset for a bit, it's natural. However, it can become unnecessary after a while. A relationship is a two-way street and, if one person isn't happy, they don't have to stay in it. For you to get furious because they left shows a bit of selfishness for not respecting their wishes.
On the other hand, a person who breaks up with someone can also reveal their character if they give you a false reason for breaking up with you. No one deserves to be lied to, especially in that situation. To lie to someone is already disrespectful, but to not have the courage to give someone who loved you an honest reason is disheartening. No one deserves a lie just to be spared agony.
Additionally, after a lot of relationships people's mindsets change, and certain relationships can really change a person. It can be hard for someone to get back out there. It all depends on how they perceive the end of the relationship. Ending it allows you the opportunity to figure out what you want. People may cry a lot, or constantly be in a state of melancholy, but that shows them that they truly cared and were ready to care for someone on a deep level. This is when you know you are ready to find love and make it last. And that the break up was the best thing for you. Sure, it sucks, but you learned that true love is worth the tears. Look at this as a new opportunity, not a loss. Don't be sad it's over, be happy it happened.
Every single relationship you have is an opportunity to be happy and learn a lesson about yourself. It's amazing people can fall in love with someone and in an instant it's over. That's just what happens and that's the risk people take. But, each risk makes you stronger and more confident. You learn to respect yourself more and find confidence you didn't you had, which leads to finding that in someone else. You begin to find what you deserve, and once you know, finding love will happen naturally.
