A funny thing happened recently.
In an interview on the late-night talk show "Conan," notable comedian, writer and actor Patton Oswalt discussed the difficulties of dealing with his late wife's death and coming to terms with being a widower.
"Wait, this is funny?" you might ask.
Is there anything funny about losing a loved one? No, of course not. There's nothing that can explain the depth of pain that can only come from death, especially when it's sudden and unexpected.
But, using humor to cope with the aftermath can help.
In the context of Patton's Oswalt's interview, making jokes about it didn't detract from how messed up the whole situation was and is. He wasn't trying to brush off how painful it's been for him and his 7-year-old daughter.
Instead, he showed how he used humor to face his struggles head on while also making it understandable to the audience so that they could laugh with him, not at his situation.
Some might watch this interview and argue that it's inappropriate to laugh at tragedy, misfortune, and all-around crappy situations. But in reality, laughter is actually one of the best ways to deal with them.
The Association for Psychological Science published an article that explores the connection between humor and tragedy, namely, how humans can draw something funny from negative circumstances in the first place. It presents what's called the "benign-violation theory," where people are amused by anything that threatens their worldview as long as they can maintain psychological distance.
In the latter half of the article, it states,
"An ability to laugh at rough moments can reduce the negative emotions surrounding a stressful event and also create the positive feelings associated with amusement in general. Put together, those two affective swings can enhance a person’s coping powers."
The "benign-violation theory" is certainly alive and well in the present. Just take a look at meme culture and count how much of it revolves around tragic events, like the 9/11 attacks or, more recently, the fatal shooting of a Cincinnati Zoo gorilla. Other than these examples showing how weird the internet can be, they're also met with mixed reaction, from people thinking it's hilarious to other regarding it as tasteless and incredibly disrespectful.
Sure, there is a line that can be drawn for going too far and/or being too insensitive, but that line is subjective because psychological distance is subjective.
Everyone has their own way of coping. There's no gold standard or cookie cutter mold for it, but maybe there is a point to laughter being the best medicine.
