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Dating

My Fellow Young Women, Make Sure You Love Yourself Before You Love A Man

Ladies, chase your dreams, not that frat boy.

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My Fellow Young Women, Make Sure You Love Yourself Before You Love A Man
Daryn Allen

Ladies, please hear me out.

Graduating from high school and heading into the real world is terrifying. College is a culture shock. It's scary and big. It's what you dreamed of your entire life, but then you finally get there. You are nervous, anxious, but at the same time super excited. You have freedom, you have countless new friends to make and all of a sudden you have no parents watching your every move.

Trust me, it is one odd feeling.

Yes, you still have nerves and get anxious when introducing yourself to a class, but you also begin to grow and thrive. Besides being a science major and learning way too much biology for one brain, I also finally took the time to look myself in the mirror. I finally was learning who I was. For the first time. Ever. College has so many up and down moments, but trust me on this one, learning who you are and what you desire in your life is one lesson you will not forget. Along with some other cool things like, finding people who love science as much as you do, going Greek, and eating Chick-fil-A 24/7 it can really be the time of your life.

I mean does it get better?

Embracing yourself, not counting calories, and meeting new people is the fun part. Do not get me wrong, through exams and study sessions you are nervous and feel like you might have a heart attack every time you log into Moodle, but socially, you are thriving. You are becoming yourself. You get to make the rules now.

Girls, please hear me say this. Put yourself first.

Yes still study and make the grades you need. Eat the food you want. Heck, skip class if you want to. Join all the groups at your school. Go to the bars on Monday night. Do it all. Soak these times in. Embrace the new freedom you have. However, do not forget yourself. In my opinion, learning who you are and what you want in life is equally as important as all the other lessons you will learn. So for this reason, I encourage you to remember your morals. Always know you deserve the best, even when you do not feel or look the best. Hold your head high and become your own person. Do not let the freedom you now have ruin you.

I know it's difficult. You see a cute guy in class. You dance with a boy at the bar. There is nothing wrong with that. But before you give yourself up, please girl, learn how to love yourself. Learn to love the good and bad things about yourself. Take the time to really focus on yourself and what makes you happy. Pick a major where you can have your dream job one-day #girlboss. Take days to pamper yourself. Learn how to say no to going out if you just want to be alone. Find good girlfriends; those friends will never leave you.

Forget about everything else in the world but yourself and not only who you are, but who you want to be. Life is incredibly too short to jump from guy to guy, it's not worth it. Learn that good guys will stay; you won't have to chase them. The guy at the bar, yes he probably just wants you in an Uber with him at the end of the night, but ain't nobody got time for that nonsense. Remember we mature faster than guys, and when your heart aches you will realize that most guys are not ready for a relationship with you, they just want to be with you.

It's tough and it's frustrating. I constantly think about how my life will turn out and where I will be in a few years, but I've learned to not think about who I want to be with. I don't want a boy, I want a great job. I want to live alone and travel. I want to be me. Alone and by myself for a while. Binge watching Netflix with my dog. Staying in pajamas all day. I want it all. I want to never ever forget that I am loved and cherished regardless of what anyone else says. The most challenging and stressful times of our lives are during college. During those times when we realize our weaknesses and strengths. We have to work on building ourselves, not building a relationship, that is simply not worth it.

So ladies, chase your dreams, not that frat boy. Chase happiness and success and experiences, and eventually after all this time, you'll find yourself in love with someone and will know, timing is everything. You'll be well prepared, trust me. Patience is everything.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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