It's not that I hate people. Well, yes it is, but it's more that I hate what people do and how they treat others. I'm not saying I am a perfect human being with incredible social skills and who treats everyone in an incredibly wondrous way, I'm saying that I don't consistently let them down.
As a child, I moved around a lot; both of my parents were in the United State Air Force, so I learned to get along easily with everyone. I became a very outgoing child, but I never had a lifelong best friend. I would have a new best friend every three years — that is, until I moved to Georgia where I have been lucky enough to know a few amazing people for over eight years now. But it hasn't changed my outlook. I still see human beings as a terrible and self-destructive race who do nothing but tear down another piece of humanity for their stuff or simply to feel better about themselves.
From my experiences, there is only one outcome that comes from every kind of relationship: People always leave. Geographically or socially, someone in every relationship will leave. It is a natural tendency. People leave when they become uncomfortable or when they desire something more than they currently have.
People who I have known for years and people I have known for months (or even just a few days) all end up leaving. It's the only consistent or reliable thing about every person. People who know every piece of information about me possible — people who I have loved, cherished and cared for — they all leave.
It's inevitable: People always leave. That's why I refuse to rely on anyone else anymore. Others get overwhelmed or they become weak and do what's easiest: They walk away. They walk away, leaving you with evanescent memories and feelings of depression and worthlessness. You think that if you were important, someone would have stayed to care for you, cherish you, share memories with you and love you, but it's not true.
What is true is that you will always have someone. When everyone else leaves or walks away, you will always have someone to care for you, and that person is the only person you will ever need. That person is yourself. You will always be the most reliable person, so why not lean on your own understanding?
Support yourself. Cherish yourself. Most importantly: love yourself.
