Pinch me. No, seriously, I must be having a fantastical fever dream.
A week ago, if you were to tell me that I would get the opportunity to meet an internet icon (who has previously been interviewed by The New York Times and Vulture), I would have cycled through a whirlwind of feelings: shock, angst, elation, etc.
Funnily enough, no one is more emblematic of emotional range than the star of a recent viral video, Brittany Tomlinson. You may know her as the "kombucha girl."
Below is the video, in case you want to watch it and positively revolutionize your existence.
Brittany on TikTok
Me trying Kombucha for the first time #foryoupage #foryou #fyp #AllBrandNew
As of September 6, this 30-second saga has received over 50 million views on TikTok and Twitter. Since hyperspace was blessed with this divine conception of a reaction, the web did its thing: memes on memes.
As a sagacious philosopher probably said at one point maybe: the Internet taketh and the Internet giveth. Here are some of the best:
“Let’s go out tonight” Me: https://t.co/bxnXz30LuN— Kara 🖤 (@Kara 🖤) 1565621961.0
took a shot w kombucha girl 🥺🥺 https://t.co/LXEq5Rlo5i— linda 🌼 (@linda 🌼) 1566624698.0
Now that you're all caught up on the lively pulse of youth culture, I'm sure you're dying to know what this taste-testing creature is like in real life. I set out to answer that question from the most direct source: the legend of fermented beverages, herself.
A recent A&M graduate who works in the financial realm of Dallas, Tomlinson is just as animated and authentic as her online persona, despite her rapid rise to fame.
When reflecting upon her new notoriety, she concludes "it has been so fast-paced! Now, I can't go to Walmart looking ugly… because I'll have to take pictures with people… Like I was in a random Forever 21 and someone recognized me!"
This instance is a beacon of irony, as Forever 21 is about to close down its stores and Tomlinson simultaneously faces a new beginning of potentiality, with millions of new eyes on her. While the franchise won't last, Tomlinson has every intention for longevity.
Embracing her down-to-earth brand, Tomlinson has started a new satirical series called "Depression Meal Check" in which she posts the all-too-"relatable" foods that one makes for oneself when one cannot force-cook a respectable snack. Examples include, "an avocado… a large McDonalds fries, and corn at 4 p.m."
Responding to this comedic method that normalizes mental illness, fans have sent Tomlinson photos of their very own "depression meals," much to the delight of the trend's pioneer, who then let out her signature "witch cackle."
"I've had this laugh forever…which made me 'the funny girl', but I wish people knew I'm also lowkey smart and multidimensional!"
Riley Farrell
Practicing some hard-hitting journalism, I asked her the most important and "targeted" question of all: screw, marry, kill – Dolly Parton, Yung Gravy, and Buzz Lightyear.
She opted to tie the knot with her country role-model, Dolly Parton, and "rock Yung Gravy's world, easily". Sorry, Buzz.
Perpetually grateful, she credits the infectiously "welcoming internet community" for encouraging her to eventually change her livelihood from a "nine to five banking employment, which I have discovered, is not my thing."
If you want to see more of Tomlinson, it is your lucky eon because she plans to "fully transition to the online platform in the next two to three months."
