The sun was coming down as Milo pulled up at Drew’s house. The party was starting in about two hours and they both wanted to show up prepared. Milo brought in a handle of Jameson, and Drew had just picked up about a quad of Skywalker OG. Milo had half a Xanax in his Chapstick cap, just in case the party called for it.

The first drink is always the strongest; they always seemed to go down easier and easier after that. After about the third drink, Drew finally brought her up.

“So you going to talk to her, or what?”

“Dude, don’t make this a thing. If you make this a thing, then I will be nervous and have unnecessary thoughts.”

“I’m just asking! It’s a party. There will be beverages galore, and I’m sure you guys will both be loose enough to finally have a good conversation. But you should make sure she starts it. Don’t act like you are interested in talking to her.”

“Drew, last time I took your advice it left me feeling like an idiot. Why should I do that again? It sounds completely opposite of what I should be doing.”

“Think about it, dude. This is a party. There are going to be a lot of guys there- intoxicated guys. Rachel is an attractive girl; they are all going to be hitting on her. You don’t want to be just one of those guys. You have to stand out. Act like you aren’t interested. Act like you didn’t come there for a girl, but to just have fun.” The advice was starting to make more sense to Milo as he digested it.

“Alright, I guess I can give it a try. You better be right this time.” Their buzz was starting to build, so they figured they were ready for the party. The hotbox on the way over to the party was giving Milo some anxiety about what was about to go down. He could feel his palms getting sweaty and his heart racing in his chest. He pulled out his Chapstick, and figuring it was only right, he popped his pill. After all, they were anti-anxiety pills.

They pulled up and the party already seemed to be cracking. The bass could be heard bumping all the way down the street. A lot was riding on tonight. To Milo, Rachel was the one that was going to help him through all of this. Once he established a relationship with her, he knew that she could help him heal through this hard time in his life. Which was exciting for him, because it was getting hard to breathe with everything that was piling up. He dreamed of what it would be like for her to just take him in as he was. The voices needed to be stopped, and she held the power to do just that. Tonight he would try to silence the voices; tonight he would find out if dreams could become reality.

With the voices growing ever so strongly, chanting the reminders of the broken family that dissipated over the past year and the girlfriend that moved on to better things, Milo was ready for tonight. Fellow voices accompanied the ones that had already made themselves at home in Milo’s head. There was a reminder that some people actually cared, as Norma’s question about the status of Milo’s life circled around his brain. It found itself intertwined with questions about the relationship that his mother was now indulging in. But they seemed insignificant as soon as he saw her.

He saw her pretty quickly when he walked in, and immediately went to the next room, making sure to not make eye contact with her. He wanted it to seem like he had forgotten she was even going. Milo made his way to the beer pong table. The crowd was big, and he didn’t know many people so he already lost Drew right when they came in. He figured he would make a drink and watch the beer pong games. He wanted to play, but instead acted casual, like he actually belonged at the party.

After a couple of games went by, Milo was working on his fifth drink and the pill was starting to hit. He was as relaxed as he could be. He honestly didn’t care about Rachel anymore; he became confident. He knew she would come up to him by the end of the night. The confidence must have been showing, because someone asked if he wanted to play. It was this guy named Gerald. Milo had seen him around campus before, and was pretty sure they even had a class together at one point. Regardless, Milo knew that they were on drastically different popularity levels, but it seemed beer pong disregarded the social norms and welcomed all people to its table.

It turned out that Milo was actually better than he thought he was going to be. He was making cups left and right. The crowd around the table was cheering him and Gerald on as they continued taking other teams down. Milo noticed that Drew wasn’t with Carmen. She was talking to some other guy over on the couch. Drew was talking to Rachel. Milo could barely see them, but they were sitting in chairs over in the front room. He figured that Drew was chatting him up, prepping her to come and talk to him. But the more he watched he could tell that Drew was flirting with her.

That’s when it all clicked. Milo thought to himself this was the exact reason that Drew told him the bad advice. He didn’t want her to be into him. He wanted Milo to ignore her at the party so that Drew could have her to himself. Milo tried to ignore them enjoying their conversation, but he couldn’t help but focus on it. He ended up losing the game for him and Gerald, because his eyes didn’t leave the two lovers.

For the rest of the night, he watched as his best friend betrayed him in front of his own eyes. Milo couldn’t take it anymore. He should have known. He knew he couldn’t trust anyone. He knew that he wasn’t going to find someone to really be there for him. It was pointless. The people closest to him had revealed themselves to be as far away from Milo as the rest of humanity. Milo stumbled to the doorway, and eventually found his car.

Pulling up at his house, he barely missed his mailbox as he parked crookedly. His phone was ringing non-stop, so he got out of the car and chucked it at the wall. Milo stepped over the shattered pieces as he walked inside.. Seeing the box still sitting on his doorstep, he threw it onto the sidewalk, scattering the contents all over the remnants of his phone. The voices seemed to have a lot to say tonight and Milo thought it was about time to let them out.