I Know That I Should Not Hold On | The Odyssey Online
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I Know That I Should Not Hold On

When I Knew It Was Time To Let Go

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I Know That I Should Not Hold On
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Prologue

"Hey I have class with you right?"

I look back and stare. Like an idiot, I don't say nothing. My friend takes the lead. She always knows how to handle awkward situations. It's obvious I'm the awkward one. I hate small talk and I get nervous meeting new people, but he is making me nervous then usual. He smiles at me. Then he says, "I don't bite cutie."

I blush. Is he hitting on me? My friend giggles and responds, "What class do you have with my ShortStuff?" I frowned at the corny nickname. I'm only 4'9. Perfect size for people to take me seriously. Dammit, he is laughing. He is so cute. Nope - not going there. He responds, "We have history. And I thought it would nice to have a study partner."

I couldn't help but roll my eyes. He is asking the wrong person. The traitor elbows me. She says, "Of course...."

She gets cut off as a group of boys grabs the guy away. "Well that was rude." she says. I get annoyed as we stepped in line for food. I look back to see if he is there again. He is. But he looks at me with a weird expression. I blush again and turn away. Maybe I thought - maybe.

One year later

It's like a never ending cycle. I always go back to how we met. What was that connection I felt? Answers that I'm constantly looking for. But like always, I get stuck. I question if it was love at first. How silly of me to even think that. Or was it lust? I've never been attracted this much for a guy before. I get turned off so quickly with imperfections yet with him I like the gap he has in the front of his teeth. So adorable. He has a goatee. I've never been a fan of facial hair, but it fits him.

He is short yet not so short. Along as we are not the same size I could deal with that. He is dominican and puerto man. A deadly combination of man whore and f***kboy. I'm definitely setting myself up for heartbreak. It's really bad if I can't walk away and there are plenty of times I feel running when I feel like I'm getting attached. With him I got attached so quickly. I never wanted to leave his side. Constantly texting him and calling him. I was so smitten by him I spend any little free time between classes just to hang out in his room. His room was my personal hideout away from the drama and stress. I wonder if I latch onto him because I was tired of being lonely or watching my friends have boyfriends.

I did it for the wrong reason and it backfired. He made it clear he didn't want a relationship but his actions contradicts his words. I'm yours? Funny, you're not my boyfriend to be claiming me. I can't talk to other boys? Yea ok. I'm not obligated to wait for you. Give you all of me without the title? Expect nothing.

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