The 1st of January comes with an air of the new. It is, of course, the New Year. Yet this feeling runs much deeper. Humans constantly strive for the new— to advance, to improve, to leave the past behind and to be a part of rebirth.

That being said, New Year's resolutions generally tend to come from insecurity, or feelings of inadequacy. Not always, but often, it seems. This approach, however, usually means clocking in around March with significantly lost steam, and not a lot of actual progress.

I think we need to check our motivations.

You want to lose weight. Because you feel inadequate in your own skin, or because you want to be healthy, and to feel your best?

You want to get better grades. Because you feel insufficient or inferior, or because you know you can do better?

You want a promotion. Because you solely desire more money, or because you deserve it, and you’re passionate about your work?

You want to put a stop to a certain kind of behavior. Because you are ashamed of yourself, or because you know you have a greater, more beautiful human potential that your heart desperately desires to reach?

Shame gets us nowhere. Shame is a lie. Feelings of inadequacy and shame share a bed, and motivation for change that remains built upon such feelings will only lead to deflation. Such feelings do not build you up for success or greater change. They come from a place of darkness, and they do not allow light to shine through. Shame does not lift or inspire hearts— it destroys and weighs them down.

I believe that if we want to change for the better, and for good, our resolutions should be motivated by passion to live better. We must understand that we are enough first, and then make note of what needs to change.

Because it’s no secret that no human is perfect, and that there will always be room for change.

But I would also dare to say that I also do not think it a secret that your humanity is absolutely stunning.

Our New Year’s resolutions should be revolutionary instead of bandaging. Self-loving instead of self-deprecating. Empowering instead of belittling.

You are a masterpiece of creation. You are sculpted by an Artist who does not make mistakes. We must believe in our worth before setting out to revive ourselves, because a revolution built on devaluation will only lead to more dissatisfaction and unhappiness with self.

Be kind to yourself when you write those New Year’s resolutions. Your kindness will lead to a you to be proud of in a much healthier, light-filled way.