I woke up today, but wasn’t really there. The routine went normally: Brush your teeth, shower, get dressed, fix your hair; but something was different and I couldn’t put my hand on it. Little did I know that less than an hour later, I would experience a feeling so strong I’d react in all of the wrong ways.

Physically, I started shaking. The tears started soon after. A thought so universal, so omniscient, yet I couldn’t shake it away. What am I doing with my life? I started questioning everything and I lay helplessly, thinking of all of the things that had gone wrong, could go wrong, and would go wrong all because of a societal pressure I felt at the back of my mind, gnawing at me to get my shit together, discover who I am, and live a successful and happy life. I tend to be melodramatic; that much I know, but for some reason, today had been different.

I don’t recall ever having an epiphany in my short 20 years, but only hours later, here I sit, reflecting on the actions and choices of today and I feel stupid. I feel stupid for allowing my cup to empty. I feel stupid for not letting the water roll off of my back. So what did I do?

Like any good mama’s boy would, I called my mom to get some perspective.

(Just a disclaimer: No, I didn’t want to, but my concerned boyfriend forced me to; and I couldn’t be more thankful that he did so.)

I learned a lot from that short-but-sweet phone call, but looking past all of the advice, and all of the wise words that she shared with me, I took one thing away that changed my perspective completely.

It’s OK to make a stupid decision. It’s how you react to it, how you learn from it, which will truly allow you to grow. And looking back on the decision, it would no longer be a mountain but a molehill.

So, what am I going to do now? I will push forward, as I always do. However, this time, I will hold my head higher, let the molehill be, and if need be, just call mom.