We all fight with our significant other. Fighting is healthy for every relationship because let's face it, no one is perfect and we do things that make each other upset. But when is it not healthy?
If you are never sure how the other person feels.
You find yourself wondering which version of the person you are going to get. Are they going to love you today? Are they going to punish you? It's a major red flag in a relationship if you're on an emotional roller coaster.
They tell you what you can and cannot do.
An emotionally abusive partner will try to control every aspect of your life. They won't push you to succeed or try to achieve your goals. They are constantly unsupportive of anything you do. They may tell you how "stupid" and "unrealistic" your dreams are.
They induce fear.
The person threatens you in some way. You feel frightened to argue or leave. It's a way to keep you down because you're living in fear of what they might be capable of. If you find yourself treading lightly around the other person, it's time to walk away.
Constantly putting you down.
The other person goes out of their way to make you feel bad about yourself or the people you surround yourself with. You become more self-conscious around the person. You may change your looks or friends to make the other person happy. You feel like nothing you do is good enough for the other person.
You go out of your way to please them.
Nothing you do makes them happy so you have to try extra hard to please them. You have to keep quiet to keep the peace between the two of you. You do everything you can to not argue and you never voice your opinion in fear of what they might do.
You feel trapped.
You feel helpless and feel like there is no way out of this. The other person has controlled your phone, your car or even the people you hang around, so you have lost everything. If you feel like you're stuck, be brave and walk away.
'I do this because I love you'.
You believe them when they said they did it out of love because you love them. If they love you, they wouldn't keep you away from your family and friends. They would support you no matter what, they would tell you how amazing and beautiful you are and remind you they love you every day.
It’s nothing to be ashamed of. You're not the person with the problem. When you walk away remind yourself you are stronger and a better person than they are. You deserve the world and they didn't offer you anything. Now you will know in the future the red flags and to avoid them.
