"Don't Judge Me"

I hear this said for many reasons on a daily basis. I use it jokingly when I'm doing something silly and one of my friends gives me a funny look. I've heard it in songs. I've seen it on social media. Even the Christian Bible says "Judge not, that ye be not judged" (Matthew 7:1 KJV).

This heavy focus on minding one's own business has done a lot of good for society. It has begun to develop an atmosphere of acceptance. We now live in a world where, for the most part, grown adults can share their cosplays on social media without being mocked for playing "dress up." A woman can cut her hair short and dye it purple and still be considered a respectable human being. Tattoos are becoming more widely accepted in many fields of work. Individuals are allowed to love regardless of gender, appearance or status. These are all good even beautiful things in a country that is supposed to be accepting of all races, religions and genders.

That is where the beauty of "don't judge me" stops.

While this mentality has brought about many beautiful things, it has also aided in the degradation of our society. "Don't judge me" has given people an excuse to leech off welfare with no thought of attempting to find a job. It has told underage teens and young adults that they can smoke weed and get hammered every weekend without the consequences of others chiding them for it. It has taught people to have careless sex because "they can do what they want" and then have an abortion because "it's her body," but then they find out they have an STD because they refused to listen to anyone who "judged" them for sleeping around.

There is freedom, and there is licentiousness. Freedom used to be seen as the ability to do anything which is morally acceptable and licentiousness was defined as a misplaced feeling of licence to do whatever one pleases, no matter it's moral, physical or emotional consequences. Now licentiousness has devolved into what we consider liberty and freedom today and moral standards are "whatever works for you."

Ultimately, moral standards are more than some ethereal sense of "right" and "wrong." Moral standards are based on concrete evidence of the consequences of certain actions. Casual sex is seen as a negative by more than just Christians because of what it does to a person. Not only does it put a person at risk of unwanted pregnancy or contracting an STD, but it has been shown to develop severe psychological issues as well. Smoking marijuana is discouraged because it has a reputation for diminishing one's motivation and causing behavioral problems. This is not just some "social stigma" that needs to be overcome either. A recent study showed that smoking cannabis can affect the areas of the brain that concern motivation and, especially in young people, can change the chemical function of the brain as well as increase the chance of the development mental disorders later in life.

All of the previous examples are activities which people often justify with the phrase "don't judge me, I can do whatever I want." As previously stated, the atmosphere of freedom from judgement has been an amazing thing for many people in past years, but it is not and should not be an all-encompassing norm. As a society, we've taken an all-or-nothing approach to moral standards for ourselves and for others. We've made all kinds of damaging behaviors permissible.

Now, one could say, "Who cares? It's their bodies, not yours." But is it really fair to let teenagers in their rebellious stage of life set themselves up for a world of hardship when they're older? We exist in a community for a reason, and that is to look out for each other. People make bad decisions. That's why we have friends and family there to give us advice and help us get back on our feet. We've crippled that system by making those close to us too afraid to give us advice.

Individuals aside, what about the greater society as a whole? What about the poverty line? What about productivity and advancement and improvements in quality of life? Damaging behaviors effect all of these things. If we want to grow to make the world a better place (as is the maxim of just about every political candidate out there) we have to start small. We have to set individuals up for success, which can be done through a kind of well-intentioned judgement that strives to place the other person on a morally wholesome path with an open mind to receiving correction.