We all know that Mulaney had a crazy college experience, see his explanation of his college graduation and the value of his English degree. As I've been watching his Netflix specials to fill the void of Winter break nothingness, it turns out a lot of his material accurately explains our current situations!
1. The first day of break
You get home from finals; mentally, physically, and emotionally exhausted. You don't want to talk to anyone. You just want to plop down on the couch. Just like this quote, except replace "my birds" with "myself." Because you just need some sustenance. Let's be real, you haven't had a full meal or even seen a vegetable since November.
2. You wake up at noon... or later
You wake up halfway through the day, and then drag yourself into the kitchen to grab a cup of coffee, then probably go lay on the couch for about thirty minutes before falling back asleep.
3. You cancel any and all plans
Nope. It's break, you can't make me get out of my Christmas pajamas for anything.
4. You do nothing of importance
Around day four, your mom starts to ask if you're going to start on any of those scholarship essays for next year, or internship applications for this summer. No way. Not until I've had at least twenty days of full recovery from finals season.
5. The days start to blend together
The break starts to blur together, and you can't really remember what day it is, or if it's night or day. You may have been asleep for 20 minutes or twelve hours. Regardless, you're still just waking up and falling back asleep on loop.
6. Your big activity of the day is watching Netflix with your siblings
Nothing else, just endless Cold Case, Criminal Minds, and probably The Office. The binge marathons are only broken up by trips to the kitchen and naps.
7. When your dad tries to get you to help with housework, or yard work, or any work
Ha, good try dad. This is my vacation. It is small. It is fleeting. Please don't ruin the bit of freedom I have left.
8. When anyone suggests going anywhere
I am not, and I can not stress this enough, leaving my pajamas. for. anything.
9. When it's time to go to the Christmas love feast
The only time I'm excited to leave the house is for the Christmas Eve lovefeast. I'm all about Moravian bread, cups of coffee, and cozy Christmas hymns. Plus, there's the added bonus of Christmas being the next morning.
10. When you really reflect on the current state of your life
No homework. No obligations. Lots of sleep.
11. When break is over, and you tell people what you did
That basically sums it up. I hope this inspired you to go watch all of his Netflix specials, again and again!
