It all started when I was prematurely exposed to the movie Jaws 2 as a nine-year-old. I was sitting in a hospital watching TV when I first encountered an abnormally large great white shark devouring a water skier and eventually causing a woman and her boat to die in a fiery explosion. I was powerless to change the channel, but that was fine since I would’ve been too paralyzed with fear to do anything about it even if I could.

Honestly, even now as a 22-year-old senior in college, I’m regretting the fact that I chose this topic to write about. Even going on the National Geographic Kids website made my fight or flight response kick in hard.

But let’s be real, who thought this image would be non-emotionally scarring, especially on a children’s website? I couldn't close my laptop fast enough. I now know what kinds of things dwell in the depths of Hell.

A few of you might be reading this and thinking, “Yeah sharks are scary, but what about Bruce from Finding Nemo? He was pretty cool, right?”

Look me in the eyes and tell me this isn’t terrifying. Also, he might abide by the fish-are-friends-not-food mantra, but that just gives him the perfect opportunity to identify us as the main food source now, doesn't it? Think about it...

All jokes aside, I did actually manage to do some research (contain your shock and awe) and found out that an event similar to the one's in the box office hit Jaws occurred in the early 20th century.

Of course, I use the term 'similar' loosely. There were no exploding boats or water skiers vanishing out of nowhere. But in 1916, the dangers of sharks became a reality as five victims (four dead, one severely injured) experienced firsthand the lethal nature of great whites. Until this time, everyone thought that there was no possible way a shark would attack a human without reason. Yet when five people, both grown men and children, were attacked randomly without cause, attitudes began to change. The mere fact that there were five consecutive shark attacks by the Jersey shore is disturbing enough. Yet the fact that the bodies were all eventually discovered, that the shark was not simply killing for an easy meal, but rather seemingly out of pleasure, is the most haunting.

Two scientists, John Nichols and Robert Murphy, commented upon the serial killer creature saying, "The sight of his dark, lean fin lazily cutting zig-zags in the surface of some quiet, sparkling summer sea, and then slipping out of sight not to appear again, suggests an evil spirit."

Yeah that's right. EVIL. Some people like to throw around the statistical likelihood of being attacked by a shark (1 in 11.5 million), but people fail to realize that all it takes is one. The purpose of this article is not to freak anyone out or cause a nationwide panic. I'm from Missouri and I've been landlocked my entire life, so there really is no need for me to have such an intense fear of sharks. Perhaps the unfamiliarity with the ocean is a primary motivator, but I stand by my extreme reservations. I'm just saying, if evil spirits with rows upon rows of razor blade teeth are partying in the ocean looking for a meal, guess where I won't be?

Unless it's left shark. I will always party with left shark.