I've Never Been The Best Friend To Someone Else | The Odyssey Online
Start writing a post
Relationships

I've Never Been The Best Friend To Someone Else

Am I destined to be the third-wheel friend?

2486
I've Never Been The Best Friend To Someone Else
Spire & Co

“Best Friend.” For me, this word has been one of the most heartbreaking and dangerous words. TV shows and movies show the lead heroine to have a best friend, a person who is their number one, right-hand man. Songs about girl power talk about best friends, and how important they are. But what about the girls who have never had a true best friend? How are they supposed to feel when society is telling them that every person needs a best friend?

I’ve always been a sort of outsider. I went to a very small private school, resulting in very few girls in my class. We were all “friends”, but there were ones who were closer, resulting in there being some outliers who would be left out of things. It wasn’t until high school that I really learned who my real friends were, and was finally able to feel confident in my friendships. There was still an obvious awkwardness, however, as I had friends but still felt as though they were all closer to each other than they were to me. Each girl had her “best” friend, and the girls I would consider my best friends would not consider me to be theirs. This resulted in a lot of feelings of being left out and sadness.

For a while, I felt as though I was the sort of person that is destined to be the third wheel in every friendship. I've lost count as to how many times my close friends would have been making plans in front of me before adding, "Oh, you can come to if you want." That is always one of the worst possible things to hear, even now. The fact that even with you right there, you are still an afterthought, that did a lot to my confidence. Being the third wheel can be one of the loneliest places to be, as you can quickly become the forgotten friend. Regardless of how close you are to the friends, the inside jokes, the posts on social media of them hanging out, these things act as daggers to the heart every time.

I have learned that having a best friend can be dangerous and actually very harmful to a person. A best friend is like having another significant other, so when two best friends are fighting, they come to you to try and fix it. They rely heavily on each other, and when that rock is gone, they feel as though a part of them is missing, which is not always healthy for a friendship. All sense of individuality is gone, and they both become the same person, neither one of them being their authentic self.

While the feelings of insecurity will never be completely gone in being a "third-wheel" friend, I am thankfully in a place where I can be happy with where I am, and be able to see all the blessings that I do have. Being a sort of outsider has allowed for me to find myself, and be able to be my true self. I don’t need a “best” friend to have value, or to define who I am as a person. While there will still be times where I am “left out” or feel alone, I have a new perspective on life and how I fit into it. I am so thankful to the many friends I have, and I wouldn't trade where I am for the world

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Adulting

18 Things I Want To Do Now That I'm 18

I'm technically an adult, so I'm legally required to live a little, right?

1898
Happy Birthday Cake

For the entirety of my high school career, I was always seen as the goody-two-shoes. I never got in trouble with a teacher, I kept stellar grades, and when I wasn't doing extracurricular activities, I was at home studying. Even when I did go out, it was usually with a bunch of fellow band geeks. The night would end before 11:00 PM and the only controversial activity would be a fight based on who unfairly won a round of Apples-to-Apples when someone else clearly had a better card (I promise I'm not still holding a grudge).

Now that I'm officially an adult, I want to pursue some new things. I want to experience life in a way that I never allowed myself to do prior to entering college. These are the years that I'm supposed to embark on a journey of self-discovery, so what better way to do that than to create a bucket list?

Keep Reading...Show less
Featured

10 Life Lessons from Christmas Classics

The holiday classics that shaped my life

1160
10 Life Lessons from Christmas Classics
Flickr

The holiday season is full of stress, debt, and forced conversation. While we rush through the month of December, it's important to take a step back and enjoy the moments before they're gone. Most families love to watch Christmas movies, but these beloved films provide more than entertainment. Here are 10 life lessons that I've learned from the holiday classics we watch every year.

Keep Reading...Show less
Featured

15 Mind-Bending Riddles

Hopefully they will make you laugh.

200377
 Ilistrated image of the planet and images of questions
StableDiffusion

I've been super busy lately with school work, studying, etc. Besides the fact that I do nothing but AP chemistry and AP economics, I constantly think of stupid questions that are almost impossible to answer. So, maybe you could answer them for me, and if not then we can both wonder what the answers to these 15 questions could be.

Keep Reading...Show less
Entertainment

Most Epic Aurora Borealis Photos: October 2024

As if May wasn't enough, a truly spectacular Northern Lights show lit up the sky on Oct. 10, 2024

20994
stunning aurora borealis display over a forest of trees and lake
StableDiffusion

From sea to shining sea, the United States was uniquely positioned for an incredible Aurora Borealis display on Thursday, Oct. 10, 2024, going into Friday, Oct. 11.

It was the second time this year after an historic geomagnetic storm in May 2024. Those Northern Lights were visible in Europe and North America, just like this latest rendition.

Keep Reading...Show less
 silhouette of a woman on the beach at sunrise
StableDiffusion

Content warning: This article contains descriptions of suicide/suicidal thoughts.

When you are feeling down, please know that there are many reasons to keep living.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments