During my senior year of high school, a friend of mine told me "sometimes it's okay to be selfish, sometimes you need to be" and this is possibly the most valuable piece of advice I have received in my entire life. I think it is important for everyone to realize this. My entire life I worked so hard to be as selfless as possible, even giving up my own happiness and self worth in the process, and until my friend said this to me, I never realized how detrimental that mindset was. It is absolutely necessary to live your life selfishly, as long as it is for the improvement of your quality of life. Don't take this to mean that you can go steal from a store because it will make your life better, because that's not what I mean. What I mean is that when you are surrounded by people who don't love you and don't care about your life and you are struggling and nobody is noticing, it is okay to be selfish and take care of yourself, even if that means leaving behind those that were hurting you. An important part of living selfishly is also learning to not apologize for who you are, and this is the part I am just now learning (and perfecting). Sure, you can live selfishly, but it doesn't matter if you apologize for everything you are and everything you do every minute of every day. You have to truly believe that you deserve to be selfish, and that includes getting rid of that feeling of guilt for who you are. Stop apologizing for who you are, because who you are is not a crime. In order to truly be happy, you have to focus on you and what you need, and that is all that matters. Your mental health is much more important than anyone else's comfort. You are going to lose friends along the way, take it from someone who has lost a plethora of friends along the same path. But that is okay. That is part of life and it is going to hurt and it is going to make you doubt this entire life philosophy, but in the end, those friends you lose, were never truly your friends. Friends understand when you need to focus on yourself, friends allow you and help you improve your mental health, friends don't guilt you for taking "me time", and friends don't make you hate yourself for focusing on your happiness. If you lose any friends in the process, it is a blessing in disguise. No matter which pieces of this advice you take, I want every one who reads this to remember that they are allowed to be selfish. You are allowed to change things in your life you don't like, even if that means leaving friends behind. You are in control of your life, stop letting the fear of what others think and feel take the wheel. Only you decide what happens in this life, so take control of it, be selfish, and make this life what you want it to be and what you deserve it to be.
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1. When you see each other after a hiatus it is like no time has passed.
Regardless of what you may have gone through, nothing can change the banter and personal communication you and your friends share. Nothing feels awkward or forced because you are having too much fun catching up!
2. You plan your outings around each other's schedules.
Your friend's work schedules or class schedules are memorized like the back of your hand. They are your priority, and you will do anything you can to get them to join you on adventures when it is convenient to do so.
3. You say 'I love you' on the phone.
Yes, you may say it in real life too, but saying it after a phone call means it has become a customary for you to validate your appreciate for one other. Like a significant other or family member, you feel the desire to express your love at the end of a conversation.
4. Nothing is boring when you are together.
No matter what you do together, you always have a good time. Why? Because your friends' company is all you need. With the right people, you can make any situation memorable.
5. You share weird inside jokes no one else understands.
And you would like to keep it that way. If you are anything like my friend group, we share a strange family dynamic that has lasted as a running joke forever. No matter what it is, your inside jokes and sly smirks will keep the spirits up for ages.
6. You plan to hang out for a couple hours but end up together the entire day.
So now you just expect it and prepare for a 24-hour long get-together. Naps are often a part of the agenda.
7. The hugs say a thousand words.
Perhaps you do it a little too much, but the hugs you share are always meaningful and comforting. Gotta love those group hugs especially!
8. You go on spontaneous adventures together.
It is where your favorite memories come from. Even though you might not be able to do them as much as you would like, you are always down for a trip, big or small, with the group.
9. You consider each other family.
Because you consider each other family, you treat each other like family. Constant love, constant support, and a tremendous amount of meals spent together.
10. They make you a better person.
It is not a special friend group unless you learn from one another. You had to be selective when choosing your friends and when you did, you felt like they could teach you a thing or two. Their actions influence who you are and you could not be more thankful.
11. You can't imagine life without them.
The very thought scares you and sends your heart racing. Thankfully, the ultimate friend group is right there with you so you never have to second-guess their loyalty. Instead, you can bask in the glory that is your ultimate friend group. #squadgoals.
1. No school = no stress.
There are no essays to write, no books to read, and no deadlines to meet. The only worry in the world is keeping track of putting sunblock on.
2. Country music is more fun to listen to.
All true fans will listen to country music 365 days a year, but we all know that it's so much better in the summer when you can roll down the windows.
3. Your skin looks and feels better.
Even if you don't have the type of skin that tans, there is more color there than in the winter ... maybe. Freckles, tan lines, peeling burns and clear skin make for a happier camper. You'll forget all about the ghost version of yourself that was shedding dry skin like a snake over the winter.
4. Being barefoot 24/7 is an option.
Obviously wearing no shoes in the middle of a blizzard isn't acceptable. You know what is, though? Wearing no shoes in the summer ever because why not?
5. Ice cream is an acceptable snack.
For people like me who can't resist ice cream even on a 10 degree day, summer is a giant ice cream blessing. Not only does it taste like heaven, it's actually refreshing.
6. Minimal clothing is required.
Is there anything worse than having to put on layers in the wintertime only to sweat to death the minute you come back inside? No need for more than a tank top and shorts in the summertime.
7. Going to the beach daily isn't weird.
Now that it's hot, it's beach season. If you live near the ocean there is an excuse to drive there day or night, rain or shine. Staying there all day is an option for those who don't burn, and for those who do, you can always come back at night for a bonfire.
8. Cookouts.
Even when they lead to disaster, summertime cookouts are the best. Nothing completes a cookout more than watermelon and corn on the cob.
9. Night swimming.
Oh the thrill of jumping in freezing cold water in the middle of the night. Good thing the air becomes colder than the water, making the pool like a giant bathtub.
10. Spontaneous adventures.
Summertime gives you the freedom to wake up in the morning and decide to do something totally out of the blue that you've never done before. Hiking to a waterfall, rock climbing, going to a museum, or even road tripping are all great summer options.
Even if the heat isn't really your thing, it's undeniable to admit that life really is better in the summer. There's so much more free time, opportunity, excitement and sunshine. Only four months to go!
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