Everyone goes through things in their life where they question who they are or what they are doing with themselves. Whether you do this in your 20's, 30's, or even 50's, we, as people, do this a lot. We wonder if we made good choices and maybe, just maybe, if we chose differently our lives might be different. This is why it's so important to make sure you focus on you sometimes.

Before I got pregnant and had the responsibility of taking care of another I was lost. I was in a relationship that I continued to change for to make him happy. After it ended I knew I needed a change. So, I made it happen. I set my mind and didn't care. I left my small home town and moved 13 hours away from the only place I've ever really known. I lived in a major city for a year and re-discovered a love for myself. I learned I am not a city person, but I also met some wonderful people who made an ever lasting impression on my life.

Once I learned what I needed, I made the decision to move back to New York and try to fix my career. I took the time to focus on myself. It was rough when I came back. A lot of issues career wise put me in a bad mind set and made me lose my focus. But, I eventually turned it around and then learned even more stuff about myself.

Being a negative and hateful person is not my nature.

I got rid of some very toxic relationships that I had going. I like being upbeat and positive. I like believing the good in people and doing things that I feel is right. I hate to dwell on things I have no control over. I also can not be around a constant negative attitude because it is draining. So, I removed myself from it.

I enjoy my job, but I do not love my job.

I am also very good at my job, but I learned that no matter what you do, if you do not love what you do, you will never fully be happy. The career I currently have to me is not a career and it fell into my lap. I never understood when people said they loved going to work, because why would anyone love going to work? But I learned when I was down in Raleigh and became a manager of a restaurant and became very close with the owner, that I loved going to that job. I love being around people and I love making new connections. Now, obviously I don't want to be a restaurant manager for my life, but it made me wonder about opening my own bar down south. Possible? Absolutely it is. The point of this is do what you love and love what you do; do not settle for anything less.

Too often we forget about the needs of ourselves, especially us women who take care of the household.

We forget that while we are taking care of everyone else's needs that we have needs of our own. But remember, you can have it all. You can take that day to be selfish, you can have the night out with friends, because we deserve it. We were not meant to work, reproduce, and die. We were meant to live. Never apologize because you needed to take a day for yourself or because you want to make a change for the better. Focus on yourself as well as others. The people who love you, will support you. They will understand why you disappeared for a few months to go to school, or open your restaurant. They will be there to give advice and push you when you want to give. Believe me... They want you to succeed as much as you do.

Breathe. Focus. Learn. Love. Never Give Up. You got this.